Danger: Diabolik!

The ultimate anti-hero was here long before Deadpool.

Usually when people are confronted by the Comic Book subject they instantly think of "super heroes" but connoisseurs know there's more than meets the eye in the magnificent world of the ninth art. Today's entry should have been one of the earliest in the history of this humble time capsule known as SPAM Alternative but, what the heck beter late than never! 

Diabolik (Italian pronunciation: [djaˈbɔːlik]) is an anti-hero featured in Italian comics. He was created by sisters Angela and Luciana Giussani in 1962. His stories appear in monthly black-and-white, digest-sized booklets. The character was inspired by several previous characters from Italian and French pulp fiction.

Diabolik was born from seeing commuters every day. Creator Angela Giussani, who lived near Milano Cadorna Railway Station, thought of making comics in a format designed for traveling and carrying in one's pocket. To better understand the tastes of her potential readers, Angela made a survey of the market, from which she concluded that many commuters read mystery novels; another version of the story claims that the very idea came from her finding a Fantomas novel abandoned in a train. Thus was born the "Diabolik format" (a small 12 x 17 cm (7 in) book), which proved popular with other publications in the same genre. The pocketbook format contributed, in fact, to the success of the character.

Sorry, she's taken.

I must respect the driving restrictions.

Sorry, I'm an imbecile poser who only knows Marvel comics films, who the hell is Diabolik? 

Diabolik is a ruthless master thief. He typically steals from criminals (and has no issue with killing them if need be, but rarely, if ever, kills the innocent or the police), and has a set of lifelike masks which he uses to fool his opponents, assuming every identity at his will. He seems to have a deep knowledge in many scientific fields, including chemistry, mechanics and computers. In his first appearances, Diabolik was a more straightforward villain who did not hesitate to murder anyone in order to accomplish his deeds. He was later given a more "Robin Hood"-like persona and was shown stealing essentially from criminals, in order to soften the series’ violence and amorality.

He was raised as an orphan on a secret island hideout of a criminal combiné, where he learned all his criminal skills, including developing his special masks, before killing the head of the combine. Diabolik’s true name had never been revealed in the series, and he doesn’t know it himself. Diabolik took his name from a dangerous black panther that the head of the combine killed on the secret island. From issue #3 of the series, Diabolik is aided by his "moll", Eva Kant, who has gained an increasing role as his partner and lover.

Diabolik recommends Jaguar.

Of course you can suck my dick here!

Diabolik always drives a black 1961 Jaguar E-type. Graphically inspired by the actor Robert Taylor, he usually wears a skintight black body suit that leaves only his eyes and eyebrows (very distinctive ones) exposed when going "into action". Diabolik does not use firearms: his main weapons are the daggers he throws with uncanny ability, as well as a small dart gun with knockout darts. Eva drives a white Jaguar, and unusually goes into action wearing a heavy sweater and pants, no mask and no revealing clothing. The stories are set in a fictional town, Clerville, loosely inspired by Geneva, Switzerland.

Diabolik’s main opponent is Inspector Ginko, known only by his surname, a fierce and incorruptible police officer who is almost always thwarted by astute tricks devised by Diabolik. The only other recurring character is the noblewoman Altea, Ginko’s fiancee.

We'll catch the motherfucker.

Always bargain in pussy currency.

Danger: Diabolik, the 1968 movie.

Mario Bava's pop-art extravaganza was his only big budget film: Dino De Laurentiis gave him three million dollars to shoot it, Bava only needed 400,000 to turn "Danger: Diabolik" into an unforgettably entertaining cult film. 

This film was produced by Dino De Laurentiis (later responsible for the infamously mammoth King Kong (1976) and Hurricane (1979)) and its #3-million budget was much more than director Mario Bava was used to and enabled him to work with more money and a much more prestigious cast than he normally did. Howeer, he remained true to his principles, relying on imagination rather than money, and brought in the film substantially under budget, at a mere $400,000. De Laurentiis was so impressed with Bava's saving him so much money that he offered Bava the opportunity to make a sequel with the leftover funds, but Bava had by then tired of working with the producer and decided to pass. 

While hippies get high...

...Diabolik does the job.

Mario Bava may be best known for the horror films he directed, but he wasn't limited to just one genre. He dabbled in science-fiction, westerns, comedies, and peplums. That brings us to this, his "spy" film. And what a film it is!

- If you didn't know that Bava directed Danger Diabolik and you caught parts of it, you would immediately notice his style all over the film. Innovative camera work, impeccable lighting, wonderful mat paintings, and terrific set design are all highlights that have Bava's fingerprints all over them. It's a visually stunning movie from start to finish. It's a real pleasure to watch each scene just to see what Bava will come up with next.

Save the day and fuck me later.

My car engine won't start...

John Phillip Law plays Diabolik, a thief who takes from the rich to give to the girl he loves (Austrian bombshell Marisa Mell), Michel Piccoli is the policeman trying to stop him, and "Thunderball"-villain Adolfo Celi once again shows up as the bad guy. Adapted from the highly popular Italian comic strips of the 1960s, "Danger: Diabolik" became one of the first and most influential comic-based films in history.

Composer Ennio Morricone created one of his most haunting scores, which supports Bava's stunning visual ideas marvelously. There are many scenes that reveal Bava's masterful skills as a director, i.e. when Diabolik clambers up walls, messes up a press conference with Exhilaration gas or pulls of the heist of a twenty-ton gold ingot. Fortunately, "Danger: Diabolik" never loses its self-irony and cheeky, sexy humor. This (and the stylish sets) help to overlook some holes in the story and (very few) boring moments.

Getting ready for the man.

Sex & money.

According to John Phillip Law, the first choice for the role of Ava Kent was an unknown model from New York, who was a friend of Charlie Bluhdorn, the CEO of Gulf & Western, the conglomerate that owned Paramount Pictures (which had contracted to distribute the film in the US). Second choice was Catherine Deneuve, who lasted for about a week, until director Mario Bava decided she just was not right for the part. He finally found the perfect Ava Kent in Marisa Mell.  

Austrian-born actress Marisa Mell gave her star-turn in this picture. With her radiant looks and tongue-in-cheek attitude, she would have been the perfect Bond girl. Unfortunately, she never appeared in a Bond film but became some sort of B-movie queen of the 1970s with such vehicles as "Beast with a Gun" or "Diary of an Erotic Murderess". While she made one other great film, Fulci's Hitchcockian giallo "One on Top of the Other" (1969), her work for Bava will stand as her creative peak. Alas, Miss Mell died of cancer before she got a chance to prove her undeniable acting skills elsewhere.

I only spread them for you.

I'm craving for your cum Diabolik.

Overall, Diabolik is a film that can be enjoyed for historical purposes, allow me to explain: Diabolik is a 1968 film that has it all: 60's Groove?, check. Drugs & hippies?, check. Fake driving scenes?, check. Gunshots?, check. Super sexy mini skirts?, check. Sexploitation tease?, double check! and what is most important the whole secret agent with the super cool gadgets vibe is all over this film. In case you didn't know who this character is, you won't be lost if you watch the movie before reading the actual comic books.  The cast is superb and Mario Bava's clever direction bring some of the coolest scenes ever filmed. Diabolik & Eva look and feel as the coolest theft couple in the whole world and that's where this film wins massively, there are very few comic book adaptations that look this convincing and cool.

Here's the trailer:

Here's the cool opening theme by the great Ennio Morricone:

(Thanks to Rutaflashback for the reminder) Bonus video with "Body Movin'" a Beastie Boys tribute to the film, featuring many scenes from the movie reworked by the band itself:

Ilsa, She Wolf Of The SS

Ilsa, man eater.

The 70's decade will be remember forever as the golden years of the exploitation film genre. Most of the flicks from that decade are either a matter of serious study or a cult object with a growing fandom. Nevertheless, the concept of exploitation as a trick for marketing and the world of arts was around long before. The lacking restrictions during that decade spawned quite a selection of films that were instantly banned in many countries (mostly in the UK, USA and some Asian countries) Today's entry is about one of those banned films. 

Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS is a 1975 Canuxploitation film desguised as a Nazi torture flick. The film follows a quite simple plot, the infamous life of Ilsa, a high ranking member of the SS who's in charge of a prison/torture/experimentation center. Her motto is "Women are far superior than men, and they can show it by suffering unbearable torture" of course, her female prisoners will enjoy "the pleasure" of proving such theory. On the other hand, Ilsa hates men with her guts, so in order to let men be aware of that she picks random prisoners daily and takes them to her bedroom. Those who can last the whole night without cumming (WTF?) would get her simphaty and be spared of a certain painful death. Those who don't will die bleeding after she cuts their dicks & balls off just because. 

Yeah! show them what you got!

You never told me you were having your period!

When Lee Frost and David F. Friedman's 1969 Love Camp 7 became popular in Canada, André Link and Cinepix's John Dunning created a script for Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS. After offering to produce, Friedman agreed and brought on Dyanne Thorne to play as the eponymous character. Friedman is credited onscreen as "Herman Traeger".

Ilsa is patterned after real-life murderous female Nazi camp personnel Ilse Koch and Irma Grese.

Friedman (under the pseudonym Herman Traeger) put a notice before the film opens: "The film you are about to see is based on documented fact. The atrocities shown were conducted as "medical experiments" in special concentration camps throughout Hitler's Third Reich. Although these crimes against humanity are historically accurate, the characters depicted are composites of notorious Nazi personalities; and the events portrayed, have been condensed into one locality for dramatic purposes. Because of its shocking subject matter, this film is restricted to adult audiences only. We dedicate this film with the hope that these heinous crimes will never happen again."

The film was made on the Culver City set of the TV series Hogan's Heroes. The series had already been cancelled and the show's producers let the film be made on it once they learned that a scene called for it to be burned down, saving them the cost of having it demolished.

You can't beat me Nazi bitch!

Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS has received primarily negative reviews, and holds a rating of 30% "Rotten" at review aggregator Rotten Tomatoes. Dave Kehr of the Chicago Reader referred to it as "self-conscious Canadian-made camp of the bondage-and-discipline variety."

Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS was followed by three sequels, all variations on the sexploitation prison film theme: Ilsa, Harem Keeper of the Oil Sheiks in 1976, Ilsa, the Wicked Warden, in 1977 and directed by Jesús Franco (the film was also known as Greta, The Mad Butcher and Wanda, The Wicked Warden), and Ilsa, the Tigress of Siberia, also in 1977.

The 2007 film Grindhouse features a faux-trailer for a film called Werewolf Women of the S.S. by Rob Zombie, whose characters have been referred to as resembling Ilsa. The lead female officer, Eva Krupp (played by Zombie's wife, Sheri Moon), can also be seen as an Ilsa-like character.

The American speed metal band At War recorded the song "Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS", based both in the film of the same name and on the character of Ilse Koch.

Welcome to Ilsa's program for women superiority.

This subject looks ready for the trials.

If someone told you the film has a lot to do with "historical facts" that actually occurred during WW II, they either have no clue about WW II or they simply didn't watch the film. Although in the opening credits there's a disclaimer "suggesting" some scenes of the film could be based upon reality, that is nothing but a joke to add a darker sense to a film that didn't age like wine.  The whole WWII setting serves no purpose due to the amount of stupidity that surrounds the plot. If Ilsa thinks women are superior, why not just torture men? also, if she hates men so badly why does she keep on fucking them on a daily basis? I know, this is a B movie and that some of the standard rules to grade a film do not apply here, I can tell you the film is not as shocking as it was publicized. You have several torture towards women scenes but, there are way more hardcore examples in other films from the same decade. 

Now, what does the Nazi regime has to do with the film? Well, apparently, Ilsa in charge of a torture & experimentation center that would serve some purpose to the Nazi cause (that is never explained during the film, not even vaguely)  Ilsa, is a very respected woman among the officials of the SS so she's allowed to do as she pleases with her prisoners. Nevertheless, there is one special prisoner that will prove Ilsa he's a man worthy of her man craving pussy. "You have been given the honor of sleeping with a German woman, an officer of the SS" she tells her men before the sexual show begins. The special prisoner is an American man that goes by the name of Wolf, his "ability" is that he can cum whenever he pleases, so instantly, he becomes Ilsa's favorite.

Women are superior, that is why we're torturing you.

You should be thankful, I've proven my theory!

Wolf is the hero du jour  so while he fucks the shit out of Ilsa, he's cleverly plotting a scheme to free the prisoners and kill all the Nazi, including Ilsa of course. Reasons behind Wolf's intentions to free the prisoners are not that clear, and we're left with the assumption of "just because he's the hero" Why do I point this out? because men are never tortured during the film, all they do is work in the fields and a few of them would sexually serve Ilsa and be killed if she's not swallowed enough jizz. 

When it comes to action, the film is completely lacking. Basically you have two or three type of scenes throughout the whole film. Scene 1 being, Ilsa recruiting women to torture and men to fuck. Scene two being women brutally abused & scene three being some Nazi officers visiting Ilsa while they're given female prisoners to do as they please. I spent many years searching for this film with no luck until I found it online on Youtube! I watched the entire film and all I was left with was a "meh!" 

Let us know when you're cumming, we want to do a cum swapping.

So you're the one who can cum at will?

Dyanne Thorne, the main actress in the film was in her early 40's when she starred Ilsa, She Wolf of the SS. Like many actors, she wanted to pursue a career in serious projects. Unfortunately, this film granted her B movie star status forever. 

Like Emmanuelle this film spawned several unofficial sequels, parodies and torture films alike. Perhaps, the real value of Ilsa relies on the trend it started rather than in its quality as a standalone film itself. If you're planning to watch it because you've heard "it's shocking" you'll be greatly  disappointed, specially if you've watched other films that are far superior in the graphic violence (towards Women anyways) 

Here's the movie trailer:

 

And here's the entire movie, courtesy of Youtube: