The Bionic Woman

Bionic teacher, Bionic woman.

What could be better than starting 2017 with a brand new review? Nothing, right? So here we are again revisiting some of the most fantastic and iconic live action series from the 70's: The Bionic Woman, the very first TV spin-off that outdid the original series it spawned from. Starred by the beautiful Lindsay Wagner, the series followed the story of Jamie Sommers, a former tennis player who suffered a tragic parachute accident that had her upgraded into a bionic woman with the same state of the art technology had Steve Austin (Lee Majors) become The Six Million Dollar Man. Unlike any other series at the time, The Bionic Woman had characters from both series interacting throughout the 58 episodes the series lasted, thus creating the first  live action cross-over series (Marvel TV/Film cocksuckers should know better!) The show premiered in 1976 and became a massive success in the USA & the UK. 

The Bionic Woman was not only the show that pioneered and paved the way for shows with strong female leads, but did so at a time when The Women's Movement was knocking down walls and breaking stereotypical barriers like never before (much like Jamie Sommers did!!). The irony is that this all happened by accident, as the Sommers character was supposed to die off in the original Six Million Dollar Man series. Well that might have worked in some shows with some characters – but enter Lindsay Wagner who stole America's hearts overnight. Every man wanted to marry her, every woman wanted to be her. If you are of a…eh hem…a certain age, you'll remember that time when the nation immediately fell in love with Ms. Wagner. In fact I know we were all in love with her because I'll never forget being so incredibly heartbroken as a little kid when Jaime Sommers "died" in the show.

a life changing accident.

State of the art technology.

Well it turns out I wasn't the only one with a bionic crush. Families and kids everywhere bombarded ABC with fan mail to keep Jaime and the series alive. As clever as studio execs think they are, they had no idea what they had on their hands and did not foresee how the series would have such a tremendous impact on a generation - and go on to become a tour de force in television pop culture for women and men alike.

As a kid I wouldn't be born until 1981, so I watched The Bionic Woman during re-runs in Chile, my home country. You see, the sick dictatorship that had our country by the balls from 1973 to 1989, was so powerful, they controlled all the media, which in a way, was the very thing that allowed millions of Chileans to discover and/or revisit series from the 60's, 70's and of course the 80's. Our son of a bitch dictator didn't want any form of art to be related to what was going on back then so, he agreed on broadcasting everything foreign just because. Little did he know, many shows discussed the very issues he tried to keep from the country. He's fucking dead now, so let's move on to our review...

Jaime & Co.

Rock lifting.

This show was so dynamic it resonated with both kids and adults alike; there was something for everyone. It was clever, funny, thoughtful, exciting, and quite possibly most of all – 'dark'. The thing that was so intriguing about these cyborg characters was that they were humans who ended up with some special strengths and gifts, but they were extremely flawed compared to your stereotypical 'super hero'. In our minds it was very easy to relate to these characters because all of us saw ourselves in their position if we had a horrible accident and woke up one day with super strengths and a ton of responsibility to our fellow mankind. We watched Jaime get amnesia and forget about her love Steve Austin. We watched her reject her bionics and almost die from the very same gifts that she would go on to battle the evil forces of the world with. We watched her struggle from leading a normal life as a school teacher on one day, to battling fembots and saving the world the next.

But unlike the types of strong women you find in most film and television series today, this woman's key gift was her 'girl next door' flare. And that was her greatest appeal. In fact it's important to note that unlike superhero stories today, the bionics were a secondary character to the show (which is exactly why the re-launch of The Bionic Woman miserably failed on all levels). The bionics may have been a fantastic eye catching weapon; but they provided so much more; for instance – 'comic relief; (cut to Jaime using her bionic arm to whip up an omelet or clean her house). The writers were insightful enough to understand that if any of us wound up with these special gifts, they would probably be used in unsophisticated ways to get us through a painstakingly typical boring rough day. 

You better do your homework kiddo.

Max, the bionic dog.

Unlike the highly sexualized female leads we see on film today, Lindsay Wagner was a combination of incredible beauty and cool sweet charm. Whereas hair and wardrobe take center stage to female characters in our post-modern era, her gifts revolved around her inner strengths the most notable being her magnetic personality. Her smile was her deadliest weapon. And it were these exact traits along with her incredible acting skills that enabled her to win an Emmy for this iconic role. In fact you could easily relate this win to the Oscar nominations Sissy Spacek and Piper Laurie received for Stephen King's "Carrie". These were the types of television and film genres that would most likely be overlooked for such prestigious awards – but were handled so brilliantly by the actors that nobody could deny giving credit where credit is due and offering accolades that the performers greatly deserved no matter what the genre.

As above mentioned, The Bionic Woman had crossover characteristics that went far beyond the crossover episodes we've been seeing lately in superhero shows. The characters of Oscar Goldman (Richard Anderson) & Doctor Rudy Wells (Martin E. Brooks) appeared playing significant roles during most of the 3 seasons the show ran. Also, When the series changed networks from ABC to NBC for its third and final season, Anderson and Brooks became the first actors in history to play the same characters on two different TV series on two different networks as they continued to appear in The Six Million Dollar Man which remained on ABC.   In addition, when the series changed from ABC to NBC, Lee Majors no longer guest starred on The Bionic Woman because he was still under contract with ABC. Since he was the main character ABC would not allow the crossover, and vice versa with Lindsay Wagner.

You do know I'm faster, right?

Boring work out.

In the last episode ("On the Run"), Jamie is called "Robot Lady" by a little girl who has learned about her bionics. Like Steve Austin in the original book Cyborg, she has to come to terms with the fact that she is not quite human. After three years with too many assignments to allow her time to herself, she resigns. However, the people in charge decide that she cannot just be allowed to leave and want to put her into a safe community where they can keep their eye on her. She goes on the run but later realizes that she is still the same woman, despite her mechanical parts and goes back to work for the OSI, but with fewer missions and more time to herself. The final episode was acknowledged to have been inspired by The Prisoner as Jaime is similarly being pursued by entities concerned about the secret information she possesses.

Despite being on different networks, both The Bionic Woman and The Six Million Dollar Man were simultaneously cancelled in the spring of 1978. Unlike The Six Million Dollar Man, which ended with a standard episode, "On the Run" was written and filmed as a resolution to the series.

Send in the fembots!

Hi-tech can look really ugly.

Later, Three made-for-TV movies were produced that expanded the "bionic family" and explored a rekindled love between Jaime and Steve.

In the first reunion, The Return of the Six Million Dollar Man and the Bionic Woman (1987), Jaime and Steve are reunited after nearly ten years of living separate lives. Jaime's memory is fully restored (according to Oscar, Jaime was involved in an explosion at the American Embassy in Budapest and "she remembered everything" after she recovered from her concussion) and she tries to reconcile her feelings for Steve while at the same time helping train Steve's son Michael in the use of his own recently acquired updated bionics. Jaime challenges Michael to a friendly race. He overtakes her and she makes the comment that she feels like an "obsolete model". Michael is kidnapped by Fortress. Steve and Jamie along with the Air Force infiltrate the abandoned glass factory to "rescue" Michael.

The second film, Bionic Showdown: The Six Million Dollar Man and the Bionic Woman, (1989) introduced Sandra Bullock as paraplegic Kate Mason who becomes a next-generation bionic woman and Sommers again helps train the neophyte cyborg.

In the final reunion film, Bionic Ever After? (1994), a computer virus corrupts Jaime's bionic systems. Dr. Wells informs Steve that "she may never be bionic again," but Steve's main regard is he wants her alive above all else. She undergoes a major upgrade, which not only increases the power of her bionics but gives her night vision. Finally, after so many years of waiting around, the bionic couple say their "I Do's".

Natural beauty.

Super women from the 70's.

Like its parent program The Bionic Woman spawned its own line of toys. Kenner produced a 12-inch doll of the character, with similar features to the Steve Austin version (bionic modules and removable bionic limbs), except instead of a bionic eye the doll's head would click when turned, simulating the sound of Jaime's bionic ear. Accessories for the doll released by Kenner included additional fashions, and a Bionic Beauty Salon playset.

A metal lunchbox for children was available, as was a vinyl story record produced by Wonderland Records. Kenner produced a series of stickers and temporary tattoos featuring Jaime Sommers individually and with Steve Austin.

A board game based on The Bionic Woman series was also created. It was sold by Parker Brothers in the US, and was a 2–4 player game suited for children between 7 and 12 years of age.

In July 2016, prior to Comic-Con International, the New York Times ran a story about Dynamite Entertainment. In it, best-selling author Andy Mangels was revealed to be writing a prestigious new intercompany crossover mini-series for the company, in conjunction with DC Comics: Wonder Woman '77 Meets The Bionic Woman, bringing together the Lynda Carter television character with Lindsay Wagner's fellow 1970s television super-heroine. 

 

Barbie who?

Retro poster.

Overall, The Bionic Woman stands tall among some of the greatest Sci-Fi TV series from the 70's and from any decade. The charisma Wagner had as the leading role, plus the supporting cast and the variety of stories that ranged from weekend camps to stopping nuclear missiles from falling in L.A. guarantee a show that even on 2017 can entertain the most avid Science Fiction/Comic Book fans of all ages. 

Here's the original opening from the series:

Some TV ads promoting the wonderful Kenner toyline:

The original TV bumper from ABC:

The DVD advertisement:

A brief behind the scenes featurette:

And last but not least, a collection of bloopers:

the Six Million Dollar Man

"We have the technology"

Before there was a Terminator and a Robocop, Lee Majors was everyone's favorite cyborg. For any sci-fi or adventure show fan, this was THE show of the 70's. The 60's had Kirk, Spock, Tribbles, and Klingons; the 70's had Steve Austin, Oscar Goldman, Jamie Summers, and Bigfoot.

Lee Majors was Steve Austin, astronaut; a man barely alive...... There was nothing Stone Cold about this Steve Austin, except maybe his wardrobe. Lee Majors was quite entertaining as Col. Steve Austin; part James Bond, part Buzz Aldrin/Chuck Yeager, and part Superman. Lee gave Austin a nice mix of serious and fun. Yes, his acting could be as mechanical as his bionics; but, Majors always had a bit of a twinkle in his eye (may have been the lens in the bionic one). He never took himself too seriously in the role, but could convey that emotion when the script called for it.

Richard Anderson was steady as boss and pal Oscar Goldman. Like Majors, he was limited, but well suited to his character. Anderson could be a good supporting actor when he rose to the occasion; and he often did.

Bionic limbs.

Kill in style.

I personally preferred Martin E. Brooks to Allan Openheimer, as Dr. Rudy Wells. Brooks came across more as a scientist. The other supporting characters varied in quality from show to show, but Rudy was always an integral part.

The episodes vary in excitement and imagination. The later seasons suffered from repetition, but, the early ones hold up well as good science fiction. Personal favorites include the death probe; the Russian installation with a doomsday device that is accidentally activated; the booby-trapped Liberty Bell; the androids; Steve's return flight in the experimental craft from the pilot movie;the Bionic Woman cross-overs; and, of course, Bigfoot. I preferred the more science fiction oriented stories to the more mundane cops and robbers shows.

The show had quite a mix of guest stars. There were the greats, like William Shatner, Lou Gossett Jr., Guy Doleman (from Thunderball and the Ipcress File), and Ted Cassidy and Andre the Giant as Bigfoot (Andre played him first). There were the so-so, like Farrah Fawcett (Majors), Cathy Rigby, Gary Lockwood, and John Saxon. Then there were the strange, like Sonny Bono and Larry Csonka.

Sponsored by Adidas.

Bionic Woman!

This was the show that caused millions of kids in the 70's to run in slow motion, while making strange noises. It also had the coolest action figure; it came with an engine block that you could cause Steve Austin to lift, by pressing a button on his back. You could also look through the bionic eye, although you had to make your own sound effects. I understand these things go for big bucks on eBay.

Years later, I found a copy of the original novel, Cyborg, by Martin Caidin.

The character was a bit different. He was more of a secret agent than in the series, and the bionics were a bit different. The eye was actually a camera, rather than a telescopic lens. It was explained that Austin's stamina was greater, since his lungs didn't have to provide oxygen to his bionic limbs. He also had special enhancements for the limbs for special missions. In one, he has webbed feet for underwater swimming. The book plays up Austin's intelligence and scientific background more. It was generally well written, and makes a nice contrast to the series.

There have been rumors of an updated movie. At one point, it was pitched as a comedy with Chris Rock. Thankfully, that doesn't seem to be the case right now. It has tremendous potential as and action/sci-fi movie, particularly with advances in special effects. Here's hoping the right script, director, and cast comes along and makes it a reality. Of course, they'll have to adjust it for inflation; 6 million doesn't buy much these days. And defense contractors are notorious for overcharging for substandard work.

The original 70's toyline.

Comic book adaptation.

The following videos are TV ads that were made to promote the wonderful 
action figures made by Kenner. Notice the likeness with the TV series feeling the ads had:

Six Million Dollar Man TV ad #1 (the longest toy TV ad I can think of! two minutes long!)



Another toy ad. This time, almost 40 seconds as they usually are to this day. However, the limited time does not diminish the quality of the ad. Those were the days! they say.

16 Facts you (probably) didn't know about the Six Million Dollar Man

1. Ex-USAF pilot and NASA PR man Martin Caidin's 1971 novel "Cyborg" was the source material for this show. However, the TV series had many things changed. For instance, in the novel the hero is more like a killer while the TV rendition aimed at all ages audiences, especially kids who would relate to Steve Austin as a role model.

2. The aircraft seen crashing in the show's opening sequence was an M2-F2, a "flying body configuration" built by Northrop. The audio sound effects are from a crash that occurred on May 10, 1967, at Edwards Air Force base in California (although the dialog heard was recorded by Majors). The test pilot, Bruce Peterson, hit the ground at 250 mph, tumbling six times. He lost use of his right eye and had to stop flying, ending his career. Understandably, Peterson has said that he hated reliving his accident, week after week, courtesy of the show. 

3. The characters of Oscar Goldman (Richard Anderson) and Rudy Wells (Martin E. Brooks) appeared on both this series and its spinoff, The Bionic Woman. When the spinoff moved to another network, this practice continued. This was the first time in TV history the same continuing characters appeared on two different TV series broadcast on two different networks at the same time. 

Bionic couple.

Trading cards.

4. Near the end of the series, Lee Majors experimented with changing Austin's look by growing a mustache. This proved unpopular and the idea was dropped, but not before a number of commercial tie-ins, including a comic book and a lunch box, had been produced with the new look. If the show was releaased today, hipsters would have loved the mustache idea.

5. In the spring of 1977, before production began on what would be the show's final season, Lee Majors refused to go to work until contract demands were met. At one point it was reported that producers were considering hiring a new actor to take over the series. Among those considered were Gil Gerard, Bruce Jenner, and Harrison Ford (the producers said he was unsuitable as an action hero WTF!). 

6. Early episodes of the series had Austin killing villains on occasion. As it became clear that Austin was becoming a role model for kids, the level of violence in the series decreased, with Austin rarely (if ever) actually killing anyone. Of course, that appealed to all ages audiences. Everyone likes heroes that save the day with no casualties. I guess the old fashioned racist killing japs and commies days were going bye bye those days.

7. The characters Steve Austin and Jamie Sommers (from The Bionic Woman) were ranked #19 in TV Guide's list of the "25 Greatest Sci-Fi Legends" (1 August 2004 issue). 

8. Martin Caidin based the character of Steve Austin on astronauts David Scott and Eugene Cernan (commanders of Apollo 15 and 17, respectively). 

9. The exterior shots of OSI Headquarters are actually the Russell Senate Office Building as seen from the Senate side of the Capitol, across Constitution Avenue in Washington, DC. 

10. When the show was broadcast in Israel, it was called "The Man Who Is worth Millions". This was due to the fact that, in Israel, the number six million is associated with the Holocaust.

11. Martin Caidin originally wanted Monte Markham for the role of Steve Austin. 

Big Foot V/S Steve!!

12. The creator of "The Six Million Dollar Man" lived in Cocoa Beach. Martin Caidin, author of 'Cyborg', was the creator of the fictional Steve Austin and used the name of Dr. Rudy Wells in the novel with permission of a rather eccentric Cocoa Beach physician of the same name who used to wear roller skates in his office as he saw patients. In 1997, Caidin's ashes were scattered from the air over the Cocoa Beach coastline as he was particularly attached to the Space coast area. 

13. In Spanish-speaking countries, the series is known as El hombre nuclear ("The Nuclear Man"). 

14. According to Lee Majors, he did 90% of his own stunts. 

15. The opening sequence has been paid homage to in two TV commercials - one by Coors Light in the mid-1990s and the 2012 Mazda CX5 crossover utility vehicle. 

Here is the 90's Coors Light Beer TV ad:



And here is the 2012 Mazda TV ad: 

16. Harvey Bennett is the voice in the opening of the show that says "Steve Austin a man barely alive." He did this recording after Richard Anderson had already recorded the rest of the monologue. Anderson was not available at the time to record the addition so Bennett did it himself.

Overall, a great TV series that is not dated by any means, giving it a replay value that can make the experience as entertaining as it was in the 70's when it originally aired on TV. Strongly recommended for fans of secret agent adventures, espionage, science fiction, super hero like characters and 70's pop culture lovers of all sorts.The Six Million Dollar Man is definitely a very well executed piece of art that is now a significant part of pop culture and television history I'm sure you don't wanna miss that in case you have never watched an episode from this gem only the 70's could deliver.

Here's the legendary opening sequence: