Elevator Action

Promo Poster.

Continuing with great arcade classic, it felt almost mandatory, to look into the next arcade gem created by Taito in the early eighties. Elevator Action (エレベーターアクション Erebētā Akushon) is a 1983 arcade game. It debuted during what is now known as the "Golden Age of Arcade Games" (1981-1987). Innovative in gameplay, this game was very popular for many years, with game music created by musician Yoshino Imamura. The game was followed by a cool sequel, Elevator Action II (also known as Elevator Action Returns). A shame we can't play it on the iPad/iPhone yet.

What is Elevator Action About?

The player assumes the role of a spy who infiltrates a building filled with elevators. He must collect secret documents from the building and traverse the 30 levels of the building using an increasingly complex series of elevators. The player is pursued by enemy agents who appear from behind closed doors. The player must outwit them via force or evasion. Successful completion of a level involves collecting all the secret documents and traversing the building from top to bottom. In the lower floors of the building, the elevator systems are so complex that some puzzle-solving skills are needed.

The game cabinet is a standard upright. The controls consisted of a 4-way joystick and two buttons, one for "shoot" and the other for jumping and kicking. The graphics are extremely simple, 2D color graphics. The maximum number of players is two, alternating turns.

Graphics didn't matter as long as you had enough fun playing games.

Elevator Action Classic Gameplay

The player assumes the role of Agent 17, codename: "Otto", a secret agent for an unspecified organization or government. As Otto, the player must "acquire" (steal) a series of secret documents from a tall building which Otto enters from the roof. Each room with a document is indicated by a red door. Otto must traverse the building's numerous levels via a series of elevators and escalators while acquiring the documents. After retrieving all the documents, Otto must escape via the getaway car in the basement of the building and thus progress to the next level of the game. Otto's mobility consists of movement left or right, jumping, and dropping to a knee, however, dropping to a knee is not possible while in control of an elevator due to the need to control the elevator's up and down movement. At the escalators near the middle of the building, up and down naturally commands Otto to go up or down the escalators.

In order to defend against the enemy agents, Otto can either shoot them, with a maximum of three rounds per volley, or if close enough jump towards them and make contact as in kicking them. When defeated, enemy agents will collapse and then disappear. It is also possible to avoid enemy fire by either jumping over the bullets or dropping to a knee.

Good old gameplay.

As the player progresses through more levels, the enemy agents will begin to shoot more frequently, their bullets will travel more quickly, and they will begin to take evasive action to avoid being shot, either going down to a knee to avoid high bullets or dropping into a prone position to avoid bullets at a lower level, however, they are unable to jump to avoid being hit. They can fire from any position, but are only able to fire one shot at a time, the interval between them shortening as the game goes on.

Escalators were also part of the game.

While there is no visible timer, the player does not have unlimited time with which to complete each round. At some point, the game appears to enter into a hurry-up mode, as evidenced by the background tune changing to something with a quicker beat, giving the impression of time running out. The enemy agents become more aggressive, as if the game were being played at an even higher level. The last characteristic of this mode is that the elevator response to commands deteriorates somewhat; an up or down command is likely to experience a small bit of lag, making it difficult to get or keep the elevator moving to avoid enemy fire, which can be problematic, especially toward the bottom level.

The original "Elevator Action" Arcade cabinet.

Elevator Action Original Scoring System

Playing the game you immediately noticed that the scoring system wasn't just the standard 10 points you could get by killing someone or retrieving something. The game developed a unique system of scoring that valued differently (by relevance, I guess) each item. The scoring system was eventually imitated by other videogames and today is considered the standard for any kind of videogame.

So, here's the system:

• Retrieve secret documents = 500 points
• Knock out an agent by falling light = 300 points
• Crush an agent using elevator = 300 points
• Knock out an agent by jumping/kicking = 150 points
• Eliminate an agent by gun = 100 points
• There is a 50 point bonus for shooting/kicking agents on the dark floors or when the lights are shot out.
• Bonus points are given with completion of each round (1,000 points per round up to a maximum of 10,000 points)

An extra life is earned when player reaches 10,000 points.

Here's the gameplay video:

Golden Axe

Another 80's classic arcade beat 'em up.

Origin

Continuing with arcade classic reviews today we have a gathering around magic, monsters, barbarians and swords and axes. Enter Golden Axe, a 1989 side-scrolling, beat 'em up, hack and slash arcade video game released by Sega originally for the 16 bits Arcade systems, and perhaps the first worldwide hit Sega had. In fact, the game did so well that it was inevitable to start a franchise with the videogame (including home console editions)

Makoto Uchida was the primary developer of the game and also was responsible for the creation of another classic hit Altered Beast. Several ports of the game were created, most notably for the Mega Drive/Genesis and Master System, all developed by Sega of course.

Titlescreen.

Select player screen.

Story

The game takes place in the fictional land of Yuria, a Conan the Barbarian-style high fantasy medieval world. An evil entity known as Death Adder has captured the King and his daughter, and holds them captive in their castle. He also finds the Golden Axe, the magical emblem of Yuria, and threatens to destroy both the axe and the royal family unless the people of Yuria accept him as their ruler. Three Warriors set out on a quest to rescue Yuria and avenge their losses at the hands of Death Adder. The first is a battle axe-wielding dwarf, Gilius Thunderhead, from the mines of Wolud, whose twin brother was killed by the soldiers of Death Adder. Another is a male barbarian, Ax Battler, wielding a two handed broadsword looking for revenge for the murder of his mother. The last is a long-sword-wielding Tyris Flare, an amazon, whose parents were both killed by Death Adder.

The graphics were really cool, characters looked neat.

in Golden Axe you had the chance of riding powerful beasts.

The warriors rescue the inhabitants of the ransacked Turtle Village, which turns out to be situated on the shell of a giant turtle. The turtle takes the characters across the sea, and they then fly to the castle itself on the back of a giant eagle. Once at the castle they defeat Death Adder, who is wielding the Golden Axe and save the land. (In the Mega Drive and PC versions, and also in other ports, the characters also battle Death Adder's mentor, Death Bringer, as the true final boss)

Gameplay 

 

Progress is made through the game by fighting through Death Adder's henchmen, including men armed with clubs and maces, skeleton warriors, and knights. Players are able to attack using their weapon, jump and cast spells that hurt all enemies on the screen. The force of this magic depends on the number of "bars" of magic power currently available. The bars are filled by collecting blue 'magic potions' attained by kicking little sprites who then drop the potions. These sprites appear during regular levels and during bonus stages in between levels. The male warrior Ax is able to cast earth spells. The dwarf Gilius, casts lightning spells and the female warrior Tyris casts fire magic. Each character has a different number of maximum magic bars and varying ranges of attack.

"Once you had enough "Magic Potions" you could blow up your enemies asses"

Tyris Flare, one of the earliest videogame hotties.

Various steeds known as bizarrians are found in the game. These can be ridden when the enemy rider is knocked off, or if one is found dormant. The least powerful steed is known as the Cockatrice (which also appeared in Altered Beast), which can be used to knock down enemies with a swipe of its tail. The more powerful dragon, which can either shoot fireballs or breathe fire, is found later in the game.

In addition to the main quest, some home versions of the game included "duel mode", a survival mode type game that pitted players against increasingly powerful foes in consecutive rounds of play. This mode also featured a two-player one-on-one option.

So?

Golden Axe is a great game, the hours of entertainment it can deliver are unlimited. Each character has its own unique characteristics as well as the many foes you have to deal with. They all share different skills and that can be a pain in the ass sometimes. Besides, the scenery can be tricky at times, as you can fall into deep holes that will kill you and your foes instantly. The only issue it may have, compared to today's standards of videogaming is that the characters move very slowly and controlling them as fast as you can push buttons and move the joystick won't make any difference, specially when you're surrounded by foes. 

Tyris Flare is a sexy amazon.

Tyris Flare "fighting" Death Adder.

Overall, an entertaining ride that won't dissapoint today's videogame players. Perhaps that is why Sega has released the Golden Axe trilogy for the iPhone/iPad iTunes store.

Here is the gameplay:

Splatter House

This time Jason is a good guy.

Today we take a day off from movies, as the last entry delivered one of the worst films ever made. However, today's entry does have some influence from a certain masked murderer franchise. Splatterhouse (or スプラッターハウス Supurattāhausu in its original language, seriously can you read that name?) is a 1988 beat 'em up arcade game developed and published by Namco. It is also subsequently the title of the entire series of games released in several home consoles and personal computer formats since 1990.

the PC edition of the arcade classic, though censored, it's still entertaining.

The comic strip that introduces you to the game.

Due to its violent nature as well as some questionable enemies, the TurboGrafx-16 port of Splatterhouse had a "parental advisory warning" of sorts  printed on the front of the box. Splatterhouse is nothing but a sidescrolling beat 'em up video game in which the player controls Rick, a parapsychology student (yes, a parapsychology student) who is trapped inside West Mansion. After his apparent death and resurrection by the Terror Mask, Rick makes his way through the mansion, fighting off hordes of creatures in a vain attempt to save his girlfriend Jennifer from a grisly fate. Players of this game will also recognise a number of slasher horror film influences, such as Friday the 13th, and mostly Friday the 13th. So, the story has it that two college students, Rick Taylor and Jennifer Willis, take refuge from a storm in West Mansion, a local landmark known as "Splatterhouse" for the rumors of hideous experiments purportedly conducted there by some evil guy known as Dr. West, a renowned and missing parapsychologist. At the mansion, the two are attacked by demonic creatures that drag Jennifer inside and fatally wound Rick, leaving him for dead.

In SplatterHouse you could kill your enemies with awesome weapons.

This leeches can give you quite a difficult time.

Rick awakens in the dungeon of the mansion to discover that he is still alive thanks to the influence of the "Terror Mask", or in some versions, the "Hell Mask", a Mayan sacrificial artifact from West's house which is capable of sentient thought. The mask attaches itself to Rick, fusing with his body and transforming him into a monster with superhuman strength (strangely the mask doesn't resemble any sort of mayan mask you've ever seen before. The mask is definitely a hockey mask inspired from the one Jason Voorhees wears in the Friday the 13th saga) With the mask's encouragement, Rick goes on a rampage through the dungeon and the mansion grounds, killing hordes of monsters. Inside the mansion, Rick finds Jennifer, prone on a couch and surrounded by a throng of creatures that retreat upon his arrival. After their departure, Jennifer transforms into a giant, fanged monster that attempts to kill Rick while begging him for help. Rick is forced to kill Jennifer, who transforms back to normal and thanks him before she dies. Infuriated, Rick tracks the remaining monsters to a giant, bloody hole in the mansion's floor. Upon entering it, Rick discovers that the mansion itself is alive. He follows a bloody hallway to the house's "womb", which produces fetus-like monsters that attack him. Rick destroys the womb, which causes the house to burst into flames as it "dies".

Evil monsters haunt Rick.

Escaping the burning mansion, Rick comes across a grave marker. The Terror Mask releases energy into the grave, reviving a giant monster named Hell Chaos that claws its way up from the earth and attempts to kill Rick. Rick destroys the creature, which unleashes a tormented ghost that dissipates into a series of bright lights. As the lights vanish, the mask shatters, turning Rick back to normal, and he flees as the house burns to the ground and the credits roll. However, after he leaves and the credits end, the Terror Mask reassembles itself and laughs evilly, staying there for 45 seconds, with the word, "END", appearing on the bottom right corner of the screen.

This is Jennifer Willis, our hero's girlfriend.

Overall, Splatter House is a great game, though its gameplay can seem boring at times (Rick only moves in a one dimensional environment) the action you get from playing is fairly good. Besides, monsters look really cool, they don't look like the old school monsters TV sold us in films like Frankenstein and Dracula.  These monsters are all satan's work  and you do see and feel that for sure. The storyline could perfectly fit the script of one of those late night 80's slasher horror films you could watch once your parents were asleep back in the 80's. The graphics are the best you can get in the 80's and the sound is perhaps the greatest thing in the game. The background music is definitely haunting, and the screaming, killing and evil sounds are really really cool. 

Today you can play  the game, through mostly computer emulators, the Wii virtual console and through your iPhone/iPad. Of course, the game has had its 2010 reboot, but we're talking about the original game here. 

Here's the gameplay:

Batman & Robin

the death of the franchise.

When everyone heard about Bane being in Batman Forever's sequel, we all lost our minds thinking the film would be about the great "Knightfall" comic saga,  but nope, Joel Schumacher has a way reminding us how bad his movies can get. Don't get me wrong, the old Adam West Batman TV show was certainly funny, and given the times, a more accurate representation of what Batman was trying to be wouldn't have succeeded nearly as well. But the show still betrayed all the emotion and grimness of Batman's themes.

In Batman & Robin, Schumacher seems to be getting back to those roots. He treats the entire Batman franchise like a joke. Even if it was funny, this would be betraying the name of Batman. But here, seeing as it's NOT funny, it only succeeds in becoming the worst of the Batman movies, and, arguably, the worst films ever created.

Thank God Christopher Nolan will restore Bane's reputation.

Mr Freeze & Poison Ivy.

George Clooney just plays George Clooney. Which is the road he usually takes, but this suave, dashing, and charming Batman seems more like Mystery Men's Captain Amazing than the crimefighter of legend.

There's Chris O'Donnell, the angst-ridden Robin trying to break out of Batman's shadow. The only thing he ever really does is act like a child.

Alicia Silverstone. Wow. I seriously wonder what makes someone say, "Hmm, who should we get to play Batgirl . . . I know! Alicia Silverstone!" No offense to Alicia, but she's out in right field on this one. Her tough-girl performance is sprinkled with reminders of her Clueless days. But all that aside, she actually does very little.

The dynamic duo like you (never) wanted to see them before.

Batgirl. Really?

Now, onto the villains. Uma Thurman, who we know CAN act, is hamming it up to ridiculous proportions. First, when she's playing the nerdy Dr. Pamela, she exaggerates that to a level I thought impossible. And then she inexplicably turns into an extremely sexualized villainess whose plan, by the way, would kill all the plants she advocated protecting.

Arnold seems like the worst possible choice for Mr. Freeze. I mean, of all the Batman villains I could see him playing - Bane, for christ's sake - Mr. Freeze is not on that list. He possesses none of the emotionless, calculated, and cold (no pun intended) sociopathy which makes Mr. Freeze such a good character.


In case you're about to puke because of this awful movie, I give a refreshing bonus of sexy cosplayers portraying what we would like to see in a future Batman release. Enter sexy bombshell Poison Ivy, and Batgirl dressed up in a very interesting armour.

How about this nude Poison Ivy?

Nice twat Poison Ivy!

Batgirl ready for some shagging.

And then, all that aside, they're handed ridiculous catch phrases and cliches they're expected to say with any level of sincerity? At one point Mr. Freeze says "chill out." Of all the ways it sounds, menacing is not among them.

Seriously, I'd have more respect for Schumacher if I discovered that he hated Batman, and had intentionally ruined it with this garbage. Then, this might actually be just his own personal joke. Instead, it borders on a travesty of good cinema. I only wish that 0 stars was a selectable option at the imdb, for this film ALONE. 


Now, to be fair with the film production there is actually one good thing about Batman & Robin: Special effects & action sequences. The scenes that feature special effects look quite convincing and don't look dated at all. The action  coreographies are also very well done. Unfortunately, Batman & Robin isn't a videogame, so that's not enough to say that Joel Schumacher did a fair job with Batsy. Besides, why did Schumacher add nipples to the batsuit & robin suit? why didn't he add nipples to batgirl's suit? or even better why didn't he add a red hair bush to Poison Ivy?

Here's the movie trailer:

Batman Forever

Batman is forever.

They say Joel Schumacher buried six feet under the promising Batman franchise Tim Burton has started in 1989, and expanded in 1992. After the huge success both movies gave Burton, he decided to move on, and to work in something different, something with less hype around it. However, Burton did agree to work as a producer in part three. Originally, Michael Keaton would continue to reprise his Bruce Wayne/Batman role, bu as soon as he learned Burton wasn't directing he decided to call it quits because he didn't like the direction Joel Schumacher wanted to take with the Batman franchise. From the original cast, only Michael Gough (Alfred Pennyworth) and Pat Hingle (comissioner Gordon) continued working on their original roles. In fact, they would be the only actors that would participate in the 1989-1998 Batman franchise. 

I'm Batman!

Original drafts for the movie suggest that the only foe Batman would face would be The Riddler, because Two-Face was originally intended to show up by the very end of Batman Returns (in a scene where Catwoman would kiss him and burn half of his body, while holding her hands to an electric wire) Billie Dee Williams (yes, the original 1989 Batman's Harvey Dent) had a special contract that would grant him to return to a Batman movie playing Harvey Dent/Two Face. Of course, none of that happened and Tommy Lee Jones became Two Face (Warner Bros, had to negotiate with Billie Dee Williams to do so) 

Two Face is a pimp!

So, Batman Forever, is the third instalment in the Batman franchise and the first one directed by Joel Schumacher. Released in 1995, the film added new villains, a whole new Gotham City look (more like a cyber punk pop art kind of architecture) and introduced us to Batman's sidekick Robin.  At first, the mere idea of listening to such new elements would seem like we're about to watch a great Batman film, however, Schumacher knows for sure, how to dismantle a good franchise. Batman Forever neither is a bad movie nor is a masterpiece movie (although I really liked it) Out of the two Batman movies Schumacher directed, definitely Batman Forever is the one to look for.

This babe here, will take you to the summer of love baby!

Personally, I just enjoyed the first Batman the best, I think a lot of us did. But that doesn't mean this was a bad installment to the "Batman" series, it's actually very decent worth more than one look. We do have a new but every exceptional Batman, Val Kilmer, who has a tough role to fit into after the great performances Michael Keaton brought. Nicole Kidman plays Chase, a beautiful and intelligent scientist who has the hots for Batman more than Bruce, she does a great job and looks so sexy! Jim Carrey, the master of comedy, takes the role of The Riddler, only he can bring the true comic relief and was a great choice. Tommy Lee Jones, as Two Face, was also great and so believable as a scary villain. Last but not least, Chris O'donnell as the wimsical, but more serious than anything version of Robin. The dynamic duo are finally put together for this masterpiece of a sequel! 

It's getting a little lonely in here.

Don't worry pal, my parents are dead too!

Batman is now fighting Two Face, or Harvey Dent, who was brutally scarred on one side of his face in a court case of his when he was a lawyer. When he fails one night to successfully capture Two Face, he meets Dr. Chase Meridian, a beautiful scientist and journalist. She is just fascinated with him and it's almost love at first sight for her. Batman of course is falling for her, but is playing hard to get. When Bruce Wayne makes a move on her though, she accepts and they attend a charity circus together, they see the Flying Gracins, a family of flying acrobats, but when the party is interrupted by Two Face and he demands to find out the true identity of Batman otherwise he'll set off a bomb in the circus! When the Gracins try to stop it and Dick Gracin, the youngest flying member goes his separate way to stop it himself, the family is on top of some very high up beams and wire which Two Face stops them by shooting the wires causing the Gracins to fall down to their deaths in front of everyone. When Dick stops the bomb, he is too late to see his family lying dead on the floor.

Who said I was a fag? I fuck real gals!

do you got a nickel pal?

He comes to live with Bruce and wants revenge on Two Face and promises death and justice! It's not too soon that he discovers that Bruce is Batman and wants to be him at first, but then decides that he shouldn't take over but they should become partners! Batman refuses knowing that it's too dangerous; he continues his affair with Chase. But there is a new problem, an angry employee, Edward Nygmam, at Bruce's business now wants to destroy Batman and become evil! Who better to join up with than Two Face? He also has a machine that can read a person's mind and makes it tell the person's deepest darkest secrets. When Bruce comes to a party after Edward is successful in selling these machines, he tempts Bruce into the biggest machine of all and finds out what Bruce has been hiding for so long. When Batman and Chase are together, she confesses to Batman that she is now falling for Bruce. When she and Bruce have a get together, he wishes to tell her the truth, you know a little bit before this scene he said to Alfred "I've never been in love before", what happened to Vicki Vale and Catwoman? I always wondered that! But anyways, Two Face's gang kidnaps Chase and now Bruce must save her, but his bat cave has been destroyed by The Riddler! With the riddles that Edward sent to Bruce as clues, he and Alfred put everything together and know that it's not going to be easy to defeat this powerful team, that's where Dick comes in, or now known as Robin! Can the dynamic duo save Chase in time and save the world from getting their brains sucked into The Riddler's and can Robin get the revenge he's wanted for so long with Two Face?

Oh Batsy, my clit is so wet!

Can't wait till Batsy covers me in cum.

Two Face could use some of my pussy.

Batman Forever is a fantastic installation into the Batman series. I would highly recommend it! It's got action, romance, drama, comedy, and great sets! Among a fantastic soundtrack featuring U2 and Seal's famous "Kiss from a Rose". It's a good movie and should be seen by every Batman fan! 

Here's the movie trailer:

And here the vintage HBO featurette "Batman Forever, First Look"

Batman Returns

Christmas nights will neve be the same in Gotham City.

A couple of years ago (I think) I did a review about Batman Returns, but it wasn't really that good, so I'm giving this great film the review it deserves for good. After the huge Batmania the first Tim Burton entry in the world of the Dark Knight had, it was only natural that Warner Bros. gave Burton the chance of expanding the DC Comics character universe, a universe that soon became Burton's own Batman universe. 

Back in the early 80's the original Batman movie project had a lot to do with the 60's Batman TV show. Producers wanted to update the original series into a movie featuring The Penguin, Catwoman, Two Face and almost every rogue Batman had to deal with, but as Tim Burton got into the project he turned the original idea into shreds and gave us the Batman of a lifetime. However, when Batman Returns came out, critics from all over the world weren't that pleasant anymore. There were purists, and there were Burton fans, and Batman Returns kind of became their battlefield for nonsense idiotic discussions.

Gotta go to work.

I'm really going to try hard not to praise this movie as the ultimate masterpiece my inner self think it is. I've long thought it was my favorite of the four 90's Batman movies (and maybe I even like it more than the Christopher Nolan Batfilms). However, I'm quite aware that Batman Returns has more to do with Tim Burton's own take on the character rather than, being a respectful film that stays true to the comic book. This movie, is Tim Burton's Batman, definitely. However, the sequels Batman Forever & Batman & Robin weren't really that bad, I mean, at least you could have fun with them as they sort of took the character back into the 60's vintage mood Batman had on TV. Of course, Joel Schumacher is quite a different film maker. I believe he's got a pop art vision on his mind all the time, while Tim Burton is always looking for the opposite: darkness within.

The antagonists steal the show.

Even though there are a lot of small flaws in the last aproach Burton had on the DC Comics legendary character, Batman Returns is still a great film, especially if you're a Burton fan, as Batman Returns has just as much in common with The Nightmare Before Christmas (1993) and Edward Scissorhands (1990) as it does with anything else in the Batman universe.

The film begins strongly, with the Cobblepots having a baby. We see their dismay--people walk out of the birthing room with horror on their faces, ready to vomit. Later, they have the baby in a small cage. Finally they take it out for an evening stroll and dump it in the Gotham City River. The baby ends up becoming Batman classic villain The Penguin (played as if it was written for Danny DeVito himself).

Meanwhile, Max Shreck (Christopher Walken) is the film's "evil capitalist", comparable to Grissom (Jack Palance) in Batman. He is planning on duping Gotham City in various ways, and we see him emotionally abusing his secretary, the timid Selina Kyle (Michelle Pfeiffer). When Kyle discovers one of the nefarious plots, Grissom tries to get rid of her, but she is rescued by cats, becoming Catwoman. It is important to say that most of the comic book films based upon Batman, do hold strong criticism towards the way our society constantly behaves. Max Shreck does exist in our dayliving, and plots like becoming a monopoly and exploiting your workers are nothing but the ugly truth, a thing to keep in mind my friends.

Why doesn't Bill Gates become Batman in real life?

While all of this is going on, The Penguin, who has long been only rumored to exist and who is thought to be dangerous, begins a scheme to be presented to the public as a good guy, despite having less than benevolent, ulterior motives...

Before re-watching Burton's Batman films this time, I didn't remember just how little the films are about Batman (Michael Keaton). It's almost as if Burton didn't feel the character was interesting enough to focus on. The focus here is much more on the villains, especially The Penguin. Batman doesn't appear very often, especially in the beginning of the film, and surprisingly often, we're watching him watching The Penguin.

Although some viewers necessarily count the above as a flaw, I can't say that I do, even if I'd like to know more about Batman and follow his story more. The villains' stories are interesting, too, and as an "origin story" for two major Batman villains, Batman Returns is already more than complex in terms of plot.

However, there are some character problems that I do count as a flaw. The Penguin has a cadre of circus performers who do his bidding, but even though they're frequently on screen, we never get to learn anything about them. Burton has a core of very interesting characters that could have had a deeper meaning through the film but it just seems, Burton didn't have enough time to use them more properly.

I'm Catwoman, hear me roar!

For that matter, he hardly has space to explore Catwoman. The film plays as if Catwoman may have been as developed and featured in as many scenes as The Penguin, but that cut of the film would have been 4 hours long. So the bulk of the Catwoman scenes had to be excised. Of course, all of this barely leaves any room for Batman. Burton has Batman turn very dark in the public's eye in this film, and unusually, he never bothers to resolve this. As far as we know, at the end, Gothamites still think that Batman is a murdering lunatic. That's an interesting development, but unfortunately it ended up being dropped between this film and the next. 

As for the script, although there are minor problems including some non-sequiturs and bizarre decisions (in terms of logic) made by characters, it's clear that Burton and writers Sam Hamm and Daniel Waters are not exactly trying to tell a traditional story. A lot of the dialogue is pun-oriented, but often this is fairly subtle and/or complex (of course, sometimes it is very blatant or transparent, too). It helps to look at Batman Returns as a more "poetic" film, as I believe was the intention. This also carries over into more general plot and directorial decisions--plenty of odd character actions, including from minor characters, are done in service of a general mood or style, and that style works very well.

The Grand batmobile is back!

If you were to look for a word to define Batman Returns mood, then definitely "Dark" is the easiest way to sum up Batman Returns in a word, and whether that's a positive or negative depends on your disposition. Anyone who knows me knows that I love dark. So for me, Burton's style largely transcends the flaws in the plot and the script. In many ways, Batman Returns is like an insane, campy horror film, with beautifully eerie production design. Like Batman, Burton is still making many references to other films, but instead of Vertigo (1958) and Star Wars (1977) (well, there's still a slight Star Wars reference), he invokes films like Nosferatu (1922) (including that "Max Schreck" was the name of the actor who played the Dracula-like character there), Motel Hell (1980), the aforementioned Freaks, Willy Wonka and the Chocolate Factory (1971) (which has a surreal, dark edge to it) and zombie films--made most explicit in The Penguin's final scene.

Here's the movie trailer:

And as I wrote above in the first paragraph, this time I'm giving you the review Batman Returns  deserve, I'll give you some tasty bonuses.

The first bonus is a 9 minutes walkthrough of the original NES Batman Returns game (which I was luck enough to get it by 1992's Christmas) The game was awesome, you could really feel like Batman when fighting goons to make your way to defeat Catwoman and the Penguin. Graphics and music were amazing considering the limits a Nes technology could deliver.

The second bonus is perhaps, the greatest videogame ever made about our dark crusader. Batman Returns, Super Nes edition. The guys in Konami made the ultimate beat 'em up. The game has everything! from astonishing graphics, to kickass action and pretty cool background music too. Fortunately, if you got rid of your Nes and SNes you can still get a kick playing this games through amazing emulators, available everywhere through the internet.

But, what about some fun facts about the production of Batman Returns? well, here's a list of official information gathered from several places:


After the success of Batman, Warner Bros. was hoping for a sequel to start filming in May 1990 at Pinewood Studios. They spent $250,000 storing the sets from the first film. Tim Burton had mixed emotions from the previous film. "I will return if the sequel offers something new and exciting," he said in 1989. "Otherwise it's a most-dumbfounded idea." Burton decided to direct Edward Scissorhands for 20th Century Fox. Meanwhile, Sam Hamm from the previous film delivered the first two drafts of the script, while Bob Kane was brought back as a creative consultant. Hamm's script had Penguin and Catwoman going after hidden treasure.


Burton was impressed with Daniel Waters' work on Heathers; Burton originally brought Waters aboard on a sequel to Beetlejuice. Warner Bros. then granted Burton a large amount of creative control, demoting producers Jon Peters and Peter Guber to executive producers. Dissatisfied with the Hamm script, Burton commissioned a rewrite from Waters. Waters "came up with a social satire that had an evil mogul backing a bid for the Mayor's office by the Penguin," Waters reported. "I wanted to show that the true villains of our world don't necessarily wear costumes." The plot device of Penguin running for Mayor came from the 1960s TV series episodes "Hizzoner the Penguin" and "Dizzoner the Penguin". Waters wrote a total of five drafts.

I'm not afraid of any bird or cat. I like dogs though.

On the characterization of Catwoman, Waters explained "Sam Hamm went back to the way comic books in general treat women, like fetishy sexual fantasy. I wanted to start off just at the lowest point in society, a very beaten down secretary." Harvey Dent appeared in early drafts of the script, but was deleted. Waters quoted, "Sam Hamm definitely planned that. I flirted with it, having Harvey start to come back and have one scene of him where he flips a coin and it's the good side of the coin, deciding not to do anything, so you had to wait for the next movie." In early scripts Max Shreck was the "golden boy" of the Cobblepot family, whereas Penguin was the deformed outsider. It turned out that Shreck would be the Penguin's long-lost brother. Max Shreck was also a reference to actor Max Schreck, known for his role as Count Orlok in Nosferatu.


Burton hired Wesley Strick to do an uncredited rewrite. Strick recalled, "When I was hired to write Batman Returns (Batman II at the time), the big problem of the script was Penguin's lack of a 'master plan'." Warner Bros. presented Strick with warming or freezing Gotham City (later to be used in Batman & Robin). Strick gained inspiration from a Moses parallel that had Penguin killing the firstborn sons of Gotham. A similar notion was used when the Penguin's parents threw him into a river as a baby. Robin appeared in the script, but was deleted due to too many characters. Waters feels Robin is "the most worthless character in the world, especially with [Batman as] the loner of loners." Robin started out as a juvenile gang leader, who becomes an ally to Batman. Robin was later changed to a black teenager who's also a garage mechanic. Waters explained, "He's wearing this old-fashioned garage mechanic uniform and it has an 'R' on it. He drives the Batmobile, which I notice they used in the third film!" Marlon Wayans was cast, and signed for a sequel. Wayans had attended a wardrobe fitting, but it was decided to save the character for a third installment.

My pussy wants some milk.

Michael Keaton returned after a significant increase in his salary at $10 million. Annette Bening was cast as Catwoman after Burton saw her performance in The Grifters, but dropped out due to pregnancy. Raquel Welch, Jennifer Jason Leigh, Lena Olin, Ellen Barkin, Cher, Bridget Fonda, Madonna and Susan Sarandon were then in competition for the role. Sean Young, who was originally cast as Vicki Vale in the first film, believed the role should have gone to her. Young visited production offices dressed in a homemade Catwoman costume, demanding an audition. Geena Davis and Brooke Shields were each offered the role of Catwoman, but both of them turned it down. Burton was unfamiliar with Michelle Pfeiffer's work, but was convinced to cast her after one meeting.. Pfeiffer received a $3 million salary ($2 million more than Bening) and a percentage of the box office. Pfeiffer took kickboxing lessons for the role. Kathy Long served as Pfeiffer's body double. On Danny DeVito's casting, Waters explained, "I kind of knew that DeVito was going to play The Penguin. We didn't really officially cast it, but for a short nasty little guy, it's a short list. I ended up writing the character for Danny DeVito." Names thrown out who were considered to play The Penguin include Marlon Brando, John Candy, Dustin Hoffman, Bob Hoskins and Christopher Lloyd.


Marlon Wayans was signed on to play Robin in this movie and Batman Forever - he even went through costuming for the five minutes that he appeared in the script. But when the script was re-written and Joel Schumacher took over as director, the role went to Chris O'Donnell. Wayans was paid for both movies.

Want more? Well, here's the original Catwoman transformation scene, which featured an extended Selina Kyle's parents message:

And last but, not least, "The Bat, The Cat & The Penguin" a 9 minute making off:

Ok, ok, I'll give you one last cup of tea, the ultimate Batman Returns making off:

And here is part II: