The Flash, AKA the end of an era.

It ends here.

Fads come and go. What was once a matter of laughter in the film industry, became the ruling genre, and it ultimately imploded. Questions also came from every corner of the industry: producers, directors, actors, and a toxic, rather questionable fan base. The Flash was originally intended as the next step into Zack Snyder's DCU. Sadly, movies are now treated like products, people no longer root for the artistic elements that make a good movie. Now the world has turned its back to artists, and all it does is deliver headlines based on how much money these films are making or losing. There's also the unwanted comparison "our film is making more money than yours" and a neverending thread of negativity that really makes it seem social networks could be the worst idea of recent years. In  fact, I stopped reviewing films in 2017 (Wonder Woman) only to return briefly in 2020 with WW 84. Superhero exhaustion is real regardless what corporate  patronizing media says.

In the 80s (I was born in 1981) we had very few superhero films. Superman III, Supergirl, Superman IV and Batman. Although The Incredible Hulk TV show lasted until 1982, that's pretty much everything we had available, despite cartoons and older TV shows reruns. So, an 80s kid would get his/her comic book education mostly from actual comic books, and boy were the 80s a nice decade to get that superhero degree. So, I would say there are two kinds of superhero fans now. The casual ones, the ones that watch the movie, or TV show, and obviously the, let's say, dedicated ones. Those who read the comic book, and watch the movie and TV show with their critic eye looking for every similitude with the source material. but wait! there's more! there are fans of the superhero video-games, fans of the collectibles like action figures, wear, and a never ending etc. So how can you please every type of fan? Simple, you can't.

 

Two flashes for the price of one, and a Supergirl.

The reason to watch this film for older fans.

The Flash film is its own version of Flashpoint, or any based upon a multiverse story already told to exhaustion on paper by DC Comics for decades.In a nutshell, Barry Allen discovers by accident that if he goes faster than expected he can time travel. Obviously, any Flash fan at this point knows this can only mean one thing: He's going to prevent his mother's death. Moreover, in doing so, we all know this will have catastrophic consequences for reality as we know it. If you're one of the few unfamiliar with Flash's story, the film will explain it you with the aid of tomato sauce can, and spaghetti cooked by none other than Batman, the dark knight.

Production wise,  the scarlet speedster film faced a neverending season of problems that halted and delayed the project for five years. The internet incels, paid & biased media, made it really difficult for Warner Bros to develop a cohesive and coherent cinematic universe. On the one hand,every film, save for Wonder Woman & Aquaman "performed" really well ,although Wonder Woman's sequel flopped despite being released for free on streaming platforms for the pandemic. On the other hand, Aquaman's sequel has been halted and delayed by Amber Heard's divorce, and the many changes Warner Bros fat executives demanded. So in a strange universal alignment, real life problems seem to have defeated the idea of having a shared multiverse. Oh, I forgot the Shazam movies and the Blue Beetle one coming soon. They're also hot garbage, or at most filler material for something that will never be. Enter James Gunn, the new head of the cinematic reboot he promises will change the tide to smooth sailing. However, his The Suicide Squad film wasn't that much of a success. Perhaps, Peacemaker seemed like an original idea, a one hit wonder, in music terms but nothing worth calling groundbreaking.

 

Iris West and her unfinished arc.

His face relates to our experience as fans.

Anyway, going back to The Flash, the film would originally  Superman & Aquaman, and perhaps other Justice League members but nope. Henry Cavil was fired years ago, and despite all the love he gets on the internet, not even The Rock and his Black Adam cameo could save him. Moreover, Warner Bros, and James Gunn just didn't care at what millions of fans were asking for years on the internet. True, we got the Zack Snyder 4 hour cut of the Justice League Warner execs spent years saying it didn't exist. Oh, also that canceled Batgirl film. Not to mention Ezra Miller's legal problems which led a lot of people into boycotting this film.

At this point, we realize we're focusing on corporate business territory we shouldn't give a crap about. Sadly, this is how both social and official media work these days. We are told to celebrate those who get richer, and laugh at those who don't. So where is the art in that? Where are those cinema fans looking for a soul changing experience? Well, they're probably busy buying stuff they don't need.

The batmobile rides again (not)

A nice Supergirl with no future.

So in a world where everything is based on algorithms that will offer customized ads to maintain your brain busy consuming and avoiding at all costs thinking, how hard can it be for another superhero film to make sense? While The Flash flopped in theaters, it's actually doing pretty well on streaming and on-demand services. 

Useless business talk aside, The Flash offers an entertaining story that is outdone by what was happening outside in the real world. Going to the movies knowing this is a standalone project with no future led a lot of people into not buying the movie tickets. How can you root for characters that will never return? For example, Supergirl. Sasha Calle's version of Kara Zor-El while brief, leaves a mark, and a lot of people would have loved to see more of her. Same with Michael Keaton's return as Batman. Fans of his movies were thrilled when the official announcement was made, but nope, no more movies for him too. Moreover, Ben Affleck's Batman also shows up for one final adventure, and I know many people liked his take on the caped crusader. While comparisons are a bitch, the other film example I can think is Rogue One. A film that is completely wasted by the fact everyone knew every main character would die at the end. Bad idea! The viewer needs to establish an emotional interest in character development. If you already know what's coming you simply lose interest. I for one, think The Flash is a good movie, but it could have been larger than life had it not being devoured by behind the scenes trouble.

As above mentioned, time travel changes everything for Barry Allen. The first big change, is he meets a younger version of himself, and this is the best part of the movie. The way Ezra Miller is capable of portraying two very different versions of himself, proves he can act. Sadly, there won't be any more movies to see how much farther he could have expanded the fastest man alive story. 

Zod returns, and where is Superman?

Batfleck's final adventure.

Another interesting occurrence in The Flash is how much they reused from Man Of Steel to tell the main story. But, didn't people hate Man Of Steel? Why choose this particular film to be the setting of the story? I don't think I have an answer for that. Henry Cavil is nowhere to be found in the film, yet we get all his foes back searching for him, while they conveniently adjust the story to offer us Supergirl instead. 

 

Early on the movie also offers the last Justice League moment from the DCU. Batman, The Flash and Wonder Woman. I have to admit I jumped in happiness when she showed up! Gal Gadot did a wonderful job! I do hope she gets a chance to complete her trilogy of films. I mean, James Gunn gave Margot Robbie's Harley Quinn a chance, why stop there? Heads up! there is a rumor that James Gunn, Peter Safran, and Gal Gadot herself are working in Wonder Woman 3 as I'm posting this review.

 

Here to do a man's job.

The lasso of truth delivers the best joke.

 

Plot wise, Barry Allen discovers the mess he caused, so in teaching his younger version how to become The Flash, he loses his powers, which leads to laughter as the inexperienced young Barry attempts to master his powers as fast as he can. Of course, in this new reality there is no Superman, no Justice League, so while the original Barry knows there is no way he can defeat General Zod, because... he was there! In a cleverly placed sequence, we discover he was testing his powers with a proto-suit while Earth was invaded by Kal-El's not so friendly long lost relatives. So with no powers, and a younger version of himself, all they can do is hope The Batman still exists, which to our 40 year old happiness, it actually does! Bruce Wayne, The Batman returns from self-imposed exile, and it's none other than Michael Keaton himself. Tim Burton's Batman is back for one final adventure.

 

The batmobile, the batwing, the batcave and even a collection of bat-suits all return to the big screen bringing mostalgia to its peak once we hear him say "Yes, I'm Batman". However, he'll only help them find this Superman and then hit the sack. The white whale proves to be well guarded by mad scientists and a legion of soldiers. Obviously, Batman is a one man army, so with his aid, our two Barry Allens discover the shocking truth: There is no Superman! only a mysterious female prisoner that goes by the Kara Zor-El name. Phew! We're saved! As soon as she gets some vitamin D, she's ready to wear the red S suit and cape to take down the bad guys and see if she can find his long lost cousin.

 

Just in case, a few extra bat-suits.

 

 

Moving forward is the only way.

 

The concept of time travel in the movie offers one valuable life lesson. What if all the bad stuff in our lives was necessary to make us the people we are today? The question is not only raised by Ben Affleck's Batman, but also by many other characters throughout the film. Changing the past, or erasing it to save the pain, will not always be the best solution to our problems. Moreover, the original Barry realizes some things are impossible to fix, and all he's got left is learning how to come to terms with it.

 

Even though the movie features a lot of DC comics characters, make no mistake, this is a Flash film, he is the main character. His personal drama goes back and forth until he realizes what he really needs to do. The loss of his mother in the hands of a mysterious murderer (we know from comic books it is Reverse Flash,but not here, we're neither told, not shown), and how his father is unfairly sent to jail because of it, play an important part in the film.  

 

Some of the CGI from the movie.

 

Visual effects, or CGI has been one of the most criticized aspects from the film. Although director Andy Muschietti said: “We are in the perspective of The Flash. Everything is distorted in terms of lights and textures. We enter this ‘waterworld’, which is basically being in Barry’s POV.

“It was part of the design so if it looks a little weird to you that was intended,” he added.

All in all, The Flash doesn't win the superhero race, regardless of how fast he can go. The Marvel Cinematic Universe did it first, despite the fact we all know DC Comics came first with many of the most innovative stories and characters in the industry.  People talk about superhero fatigue, and I agree. It's time for the industry to push other kinds of TV Shows and films. We need more variety urgently.

Justice League

Justice League saves DC Movies alone!

Some would say the entire continuity of DC Films universe leaned on the Justice League movie's success since this is obviously a billion dollar industry. 

What started with modest success in 2013 with Man of Steel went downhill with 2016's Batman V Superman (one of the most divisive films of all time), and hit rock bottom full speed ahead with Suicide Squad the same year. However, many people liked these films despite official ratings and critiques. Moreover, Superman, Batman, The Flash & Aquaman are getting standalone movies & Suicide Squad has a sequel already in the works. 

Most movie enthusiasts and comic book fans alike agree Wonder Woman is the brightest and best DC Universe film made to date (released only 4 months ago!). But everyone can chillax now because thankfully, Justice League has a much leaner story and a lighter tone. This movie isn't just for the die-hard DC fans (like Batman V Superman was IMO). From kids to families, everyone's gonna have a blast watching this in the cinemas. And now that I think of it, Justice League just might be the most efficient franchise-saving, course-correcting sequel, of all time.

The Justice League lives!

Steppenwolf, a straightforward mean motherfucker.

What's really surprising in a positive manner, is the fact producers did learn from their mistakes and even had time to listen to what people was saying about the teasers & trailers even months before the film was complete and ready for worldwide distribution. Unlike, previous efforts, Snyder, Whedon & Co. saved everything for the premiere. The trailers & TV spots never gave away the story, and other relevant aspects of the film like it's level of catchiness remain a surprise until you hit the theater, and that is always the way to go. Specially, these days where we are flooded with superhero films several times a year.

Can't help but praise Zack Snyder's and Joss Whedon's work on this movie. Those guys did a fantastic job. And let me assure you, you can't tell which scene was shot by which director. There's the same tone throughout the movie. But with that being said, if you're familiar with Zack's usage of subtle humor and his shooting style, you'll feel his presence in 80-85% of the movie. In short, it's Zack's movie(as the opening titles state). Period. Also, quick shout-out to DC Films pres. Geoff Johns for bringing back hope and optimism to the DC movies.

I can't do it alone...

...Temporarily at least.

Cast wise, really strong performances all around. The banter and interactions between all the characters, specially the League, is just amazing. The way the story develops and evolves each character is really mesmerizing and by the end of the movie, you'll be counting days till Justice League 2. Believe me when I say this, the cast is the backbone of this movie. However, it takes some time for a couple of characters to  be thought of as "Oh, I get it, this is their new personality". Personalities which do make sense after you've seen the bigger picture this film is.

As with any movie, Justice League has a few weak sides too. First and foremost, the villain is your run-of-the-mill destroy-the-planet kind of guy. And sadly, that kind of diminishes any stakes in the story and kills the suspense and tension. Secondly, the movie had to fit everything into two hours(as mandated by the CEO of WB. Thanks a lot, dude!), so the rapid-fire pace of the movie can make parts of the movie seem uneven and too fast.

So this is the...

Faster than a speeding bullet!

The movie's score in charge of legendary Danny Elfman (Composer of Beetlejuice, Batman, Dick Tracy, Batman Returns, The Flash (1990 TV show), Mars Attack! and many more), borrows some of Hanz Zimmer's previous work with DC Comics and mixes it up with brand new pieces that resemble some of his past works. In addition, he even goes the extra mile and adds a few nods to John Williams' Superman theme & pays homage to himself with a few Batman moments and even a few seconds from TV Flash when the speedster is in action.

CGI wise, everything is pretty standard for the current state of technology at the service of entertainment. However, there are a couple of moments where you'd wish they polished things better. I mean, for a $300 Million movie, it's not about saving money, right?.

Plot wise, as briefly stated some paragraphs before, the story works for everyone. You neither need to be a super hero movie fan or an avid comic book reader to get the idea. Essentially, there's this super powered bad guy from outer space that wants pretty much what every super villain wants in every superhero movie. On the other hand, the superheroes do what they're known for worldwide: save the day. 

Aquaman is no longer an Adult Swim joke.

Mera, tough Atlantis woman.

Now comes the tough question, how does the Justice League film connects with the rest of the already established DC Movies? The answer is surprisingly positive and moreover, with only two hours, Justice League not only saves Earth from a mean inter galactic motherfucker, it also sets things right in a gently manner that suffices more than 75 years of Comic Book story writing. 

All in all, the film DC Comics was looking for has finally arrived. Justice League is a triumph considering director Zack Snyder and his wife producer Deborah Snyder stepped down from finishing the film, after the suicide of Zack Snyder's daughter in March 2017. They tried to remain on the film as a way to work through the difficulty, but decided after two months to step away from the project to spend time with their family. Joss Whedon, who had signed on for Batgirl, took over as director, managing additional scenes.  

Wonder Woman takes the lead!

Come at me bro'.

This movie was initially going to be split into two parts: Justice League Part One and Justice League Part Two, with an alleged singular continuing story line. But by the time filming the idea of the film being in two parts seemed to have quietly gone away, and it is now rumored to be two self-contained movies with two related but separate plots. 

This film will be released on the 25th anniversary of The Death of Superman comic, which was released November 17, 1992; and the 16th anniversary of Justice League (2001) which premiered its first episode November 17, 2001. And some of us, lucky bastards, got tickets for the avant premiere!. Sorry, not sorry.

Here's the movie trailer:



The world premiere live from L.A.:



A brief interview with the cast:

Suicide Squad

Yeah! another superhe...I mean super criminal film!

Yeehaw! another superhero movie! Oh my God! so excited! very thrilled! much power! Mmm...No, nope, not like that. Before I get my hands into reviewing today's entry I can't help but post about my sorry emo feelings about a movie genre that despite bringing the Comic Book world to front center, it also has grown tired of itself and dangerously become a derivative cliched parody, the kind you shut down your brain and can still understand the whole story, even with detail. I've been a comic book reader since I was very little (not that anyone cares) and I'm not planning to stop being so. The world of superheroes is fascinating beyond words, yet when greedy film producers turn them into blockbuster films, there is something they're not doing right: They are not bringing the "fascinating" in comic books into their million dollar cinematic universe. 

Suicide Squad is, the latest addition to the now ongoing & growing DC Cinematic Universe that started in 2013 with Man of Steel, continued this year with Batman V Superman and clashed into today's film in review. Now, you already know our motto here is "watch the movie by yourselves, and build your own opinion based on your unique personal experience"  So, you're totally encouraged to disagree with what we think. Still, the world is built upon experience, facts & science. Film is an art form, and like any other art form it depends strictly on the eye of the beholder. Critics and real people, bashed Batman V Superman, (we liked it) when it came out. Then, when the Ultimate Extended Edition was released, voila! most of the haters became instant supporters of the film. Yes, we're a very weird species walking on Earth. In a nutshell, We're OK if you think our following review is full of crap.

Yeah! we're super bad!

I'm bad too!

Suicide Squad was, and I say "was" and not "is", a mildly popular comic book during the late 80's (make sure you read at least my personal favorite Apokolips Now), the time in which there was a second incarnation of the super criminal team. The original Task Force X (sounds a lot like X-Men, doesn't it?) dates back to 1959 and The Brave & the Bold comic book mag. The film incarnation is somewhat based upon 2011's New 52 Suicide Squad story line. Such arc includes Amanda Waller, Black Spider, Captain Boomerang, Deadshot, El Diablo, James Gordon Jr., Harley Quinn, Deathstroke & Yoyo. The ones marked in bold made it to the live action film. Rick Flag Jr. & Enchantress were added from the 1987-1992 Suicide Squad continuity. 

Anyways, there's been two earlier live action incarnations of the team before. One being in the fucking lame and god awful Smallville TV series from 2001 and the other being part of the fourth season of Arrow last year. Therefore, this film is the third live action incarnation of this very unusual team of super baddies.
 

Looks that kill.

Oh yeah! 90's fluorescent colors!

Suicide Squad happens right after Batman V Superman (there's even a quick scene of Superman's funeral)  Amanda Waller (Viola Davis) believes the world is in danger because there could come another Superman that is not so generous with mankind, so, instead of calling Batman & Wonder Woman, or The Flash, she thinks is wiser to leave world security in charge of a bunch of murderers that are beyond rehabilitation. The enemy, is actually, one of her own, June Moore (Cara Delevingne) a researcher, who happens to be possessed by the mystic being known as The Enchantress. This mystical entity hates humans and want to recover her place as ruler of the world. And oh, Yes, She's very powerful. Specially when next to her brother or once she recovers her heart, which happens to be the only weakness she has. Unfortunately for Amanda Waller, not even her military skills will protect it from reaching The Enchantress hands.

David Ayer, director of films that will never enter the annals of great movies, directs this flick with a super extra derivative eye. People expecting exciting moments or "oh my God I didn't think of that" plot twists will be straight forward disappointed by this "two hour Youtube gameplay video". Although you could watch this movie stoned as fuck, You'd still understand what the whole story is about. The sorry ass that wrote this mediocre plot is also Mr. David Ayer.

Bad to the bone!

"Psst, Enchantress..."

"Oh, but what about the "out of this world" Joker performance by Jared Leto?"  Well, if you've seen the trailers, that's all the Joker you'll get on this film. Recently, Leto sort of washed his hands off of the matter by declaring he filmed enough Joker scenes as to make a solo movie, but "some of the scenes were so shocking" producers cut them off from the final release. Yeah, right!

"Well, then, tell me about Will Smith! he's a great actor that's made great movies! he can't miss, can he?" Will Smith can't play any other character than himself. If you've suffered seeing one of his films, you've seen them all already. He makes Deadshot look like the Christian version of character, going to church on Sunday and praying every night.

"Oh, c'mon! I'm sure Margot Robbie steals the show as Harley Quinn!!" I find it hard to believe, until this very day, that thousands of young women love the Harley Quinn character, I mean what is wrong? can't you not understand her actual role in the comic books? She's not in love with the Joker and neither is him with her! She's a violently sexually abused woman! The Joker is a son of a bitch! a fucking murdering maniac! he can't feel love! he's fucking twisted! and yet, we get a lot of "I love you Harley Quinn, you're my favorite cosplay character from which I've never read anything before" To me (and to many) She's only an over rated exploited female character and that's exactly where this movie hits rock bottom. Her character is supposed to be the most important, the one that would fit the pieces together, the one that would lead others, and yet She is portrayed as being a dime a dozen teenage angst troubled kid.

Haters gonna hate!

And they thought the movie was about me! ha,ha,ha!

Alright, a few paragraphs above I said this film is a "Youtube gameplay video" meaning exactly that. Characters, are quickly introduced, They are briefed about the mission, They accept the mission, They start on stage 1 until They meet the final boss. End of game. Absolutely predictable! nothing new, nothing shocking and even worse, not a single scene to make you feel these people are actually the bad guys forced to do the right thing! I mean c'mon! They fucking save the day like superheroes do! they don't even kill random people while getting busy! And don't get me started on the emotive flashbacks about their good side. What a bunch of crap! Want more bashing? Well, how on Earth Deadshot, Captain Boomerang, Killer Croc & Harley Quinn add enough power to defeat a supernatural super powered being? Out of the bunch, Killer Croc has animal like force and no more; Deadshot is a mere mortal with bullseye aim; Captain Boomerang? don't make me laugh! and Harley Quinn??!! what the fuck can she do to stop an immortal entity? toss bad jokes stolen from The Joker? shoot a gun? use a knife? hit hard with her baseball bat? That's where this film fucking failed massively to me. The team is evidently over powered by the enemy and yet They manage to save the day with some team work with standard human abilities. I don't mention El Diablo (Jay Hernandez), because he is the only actual character capable of giving a hard time to The Enchantress (which He does by the way)

Alright, let's move on to the long awaited cameos! Yeah! Batman is there, and not only in once, but three complete scenes. First, He's seen capturing Deadshot. Second, he rescues Harley Quinn from drowning while the Joker runs away like a pussy, leaving her "love" to die under water (wow! what a display of caring for each other this turd has!) and last but not least, he's in the after credit scenes requesting some very predictable info from Amanda Waller as Bruce Wayne. The Flash cameo, is quicker, no pun intended, he stops Captain Boomerang and it's gone.

I'm Batman!

The Flash was here!

People that never watched a superhero film before, may find Suicide Squad very refreshing and entertaining. The problem is, who hasn't, even by chance, watched a superhero movie in 2016? Younger audiences, the ones not meant to watch it, will have a thrilling experience, specially if They've never read a comic book before. Comic Book fans, well, We're used to disappointment, most of the superhero films from both DC & Marvel suck some major ass.  The newly established DC Comics cinematic universe, may suck but it's selling merchandise like mad! Film producers couldn't care less about what Their viewers think, They just want Your money and They're getting it regardless concepts like quality, homage & respect for the viewers. Compared to Batman V Superman, Suicide Squad is way worse. At least, the former had interesting characters and a less derivative film maker POV. Still, the industry doesn't give a fuck about what We think. My recommendation is to buy comic books instead of movie tickets. Every comic book artist is not being paid shit for their creative efforts. There are no royalties in superhero movies. Do You like comic books? buy them, read them, buy some more, go to Cons, buy art prints. Forget about the movies, forget about that signed picture with the actor that plays Your favorite villain. Comic books are awesome in their own original format and need no updates and/or famous actors to attract new readers.

Overall, another action film supercharged with CGI and fight sequences all over. If that is what you're looking for, then Suicide Squad will deliver massive entertainment. On the other hand, if you're looking for a good movie, well, keep looking! And remember, DC Comics films will keep on coming regardless of what audiences think or experience. The truth is, these are very expensive two hour toy commercials, just like most of the 80's Cartoons.

Here's the movie trailer, and thank God, there's only Doctor Strange left this year! and like 2015, Star Wars will once again save the year for film lovers like You and Me.

Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice

Fans will win for sure.

Alright folks, so much has been said already about the next big installment in the growing DC Comics cinematic universe. it's only been a couple of days since the world release of the movie some have waited their whole lives to see. Honestly, there are plenty of reviews filled with critics material: opinions without factual knowledge. I don't want to become a hater here but, let's be honest for once and for all: There are three kinds of people who watch comic book movies: 

1. Actual comic book readers 

2. Occasional fans of comic book films.

3. Posers who follow whatever that is trendy.

2 and 3 are what mostly define critics from mass media these days. If you're to criticize something and call it names, it's because you have checked the source material, ergo, you have facts, and facts are always the truth. Narrow minds, biased sons of bitches, Marvel cocksuckers who hate on anything not Marvel related, and assholes who think films always should be smart & real life accurate, let me tell you this: Go fuck yourselves! terminate your miserable lives right now. The world doesn't need negative shit! Considering we're controlled by a few corporations who tell our politicians to go to war for the black gold every day, it's a really sad world without entertainment!

it's time to suit up.

Fuck this shit, I'm Superman!

Batman V Superman, is not necessarily the sequel to Man of Steel but it starts with the consequences of the battle of Metropolis (well, it was filmed in Vancouver, so it was more like battle of Vancouver, but only us, Vancouverites, care about those facts) Bruce Wayne playboy millionaire happened to be there in the wrong time at the wrong place. Now, I'm not a cocksucker of any kind but I must state this here: Zack Snyder is a filmmaker with big balls. He's taken the task of directing gems no one would dare to touch: Watchmen, 300, the re imagining of Superman (Christopher Reeve's shadow is still present) Also, he reads comic books before making films! how many directors can say that? None, I'm pretty sure all they do is google stuff and that's as good as it gets. If Man of Steel was deeply based upon Superman: Earth One (2010) , Batman V Superman comes heavily packed with material from:

1.The Dark Knight Returns (1986, Frank Miller & Klaus Janson), Batman is meaner than ever.

2.Batman: Death in the Family (1988 Jim Starlin, Jim Aparo & Mike DeCarlo), Robin's suit with Joker's writing.

3.The Death of Superman (1992, Dan Jurgens & Brett Breeding), The final scenes of the movie. 

4.Reign of the Supermen (1992, Dan Jurgens, Jerry Ordway et al) Possibly, what's to come in future DCCU films.

5.World without Superman (1993, Greg Rucka & Sidney Teles) The aftermath of the final scenes.

6.Flashpoint (2011, Geoff Johns & Andy Kubert),The Flash travelling back in time via knightmares urging Batman to form the Justice League. 

7.Batman: Earth One (2012, Geoff Johns & Gary Frank)  Alfred Pennyworth was carbon copied from here.

8.Injustice (2013, Tom Taylor, et al) The flash again, telling Batsy "you were right about him"

All of the above can only mean one thing: Zack Snyder makes film for people who are actually long time comic book readers, thus explaining the huge amount of negative reviews written by, either number 2 or 3 (in our first paragraph) Of course, it's OK if you're not a comic book, but please don't try to turn ignorant opinions into facts because that fucking sucks. In addition, and I should mention this because it's obvious, if you're a comic book fan it means you can read Marvel, Dark Horse, Vertigo and other comic book brands without getting into the childish poser online war of "Marvel V/S DC" that is just not right, because the more attention comic books gets, the more we, the true fans get to enjoy. So shut your fucking mouth and stand aside to allow me to review this film with pure honesty and facts.

Yes, I'm a woman, beware macho men!

Smart, strong and on our side!

So, going back to the film review, I can tell you, in BvS the world is divided. People who praise Superman saving the day despite the mass urban destruction, and people who think he's a fucking menace that could put earthlings six feet under if he pleases to. Evidently, Batman is one of those non-believers (he was there during the events of Man of Steel, and had first hand contact with the pain of the situation) so he sets himself on a quest to tell the Super guy he has to respect his new world. Another hatred fucktard who agrees with Batsy is obviously Lex Luthor (surprisingly portrayed with excellency by Jesse Eisenberg)

Standing on the otherside, there's Lois Lane (played by ginger bombshell Amy Adams), Perry White (Laurence Fishburn) and Martha Kent (Diane Lane) followed by a big list of supporting cast and extras. and, where is Wonder Woman? (newcomer Gal Gadot, here to stay!) Well, she seems to have her own agenda as Diana Prince, but believe you me, the most astonishing moment of the movie is brought to you courtesy of WW. 

Watch for my signal!

Nice ride Bruce.

BvS was filmed as if it was purposely divided into two segments. The first one is all about the consequences of Superman's fight with Zod and how this affects the lead characters in the film. There isn't a lot of actin here but, it feels entirely necessary as it establishes a sense of reality, you know, what would actually happen in a super powered fight over Vancouver (ahem...I mean Metropolis) In this segment we're also told of the most obvious: Batman's origin story (brief enough to not become a cliche), Lois & Clark's relationship, the media interest on the Bat vigilante and we're introduced to a new kind of Lex Luthor, which I might add, is nothing like the previous versions we've seen. Oh Yes! there's more! Metropolis & Gotham are now sister cities (much like Toronto & Detroit in real life) for plot convenience. 

Haters & trolls of sorts have criticized Snyder told the whole story in the trailers but, they're wrong, and should throw their sorry asses inside an acid pit. We don't need that kind of crap anymore! The internet is crowded enough. So rest assure my friends, the trailers are nothing but that, mere trailers.The stories of Superman, Batman & Wonder Woman are somehow general knowledge so facts about their origin and most amazing stories should in no way be thought of as spoilers.

"Be their hero or be none of it"

"Superman doesn't exist"

Batman V Superman, features an incredible line that I friggin' loved: "Superman was never real. it was just a dream from a farmer from Kansas" a line that surely is  a game changer in the whole mythology of Superman. A man with special features, but not necessarily a man that wants to be the hero the world deserves. These lines do get along with "Be their hero, or be none of it"  a line that fits this film like a glove: Superman is so powerful, he can do whatever he wants to whoever he wants, whenever he wants it, and it's very likely no one will be able to stop him. However, we all know Superman's magnificence doesn't lie within his alien superpowers but within his human side: He's one of the few super heroes that will help you even if you don't like him (Batman yes, I'm talking to you)  And since he's a hero with morals, we have nothing left to do but to thank his human parents, the Kents from that farm in Kansas.

On the other hand (or shall I type side?) Batman is only human, and his butt hurt from his parents death seems to be the only driving force that leads him to take the cape and cowl in the first place. He's only human though, so if he wants to prove Superman his point, he will certainly need a huge amount of skills, knowledge and resources just to try to stop him. "You're going to war" says the new Alfred Pennyworth (Jeremy Irons steal the show, and Michael Caine who??) who is clearly based upon  Batman: Earth One's comic book.

The good, the bad & the ugly?

Beauty & the beast.

Then for the most obvious part we have Lex Luthor a spoiled rich kid who wants nothing but to destroy Superman proving he's the smartest criminal businessman in the whole world. Being as resourceful as he is, he manages to do a couple of things that will make things go dark black. Relying on his businessman skills, her plans to weaponize the Kryptonite his terrorist squad researchers found in Africa in order to allow the world's governments to have something to protect himself against a Superman. Unfortunately, the permission for such bad idea ends up in the garbage bin, something that will not stop a man by the name of Lex Luthor, won't it? 

Later,  he steals borrows Zod's corpse and plans to try the Kryptonite effects on Kryptonians for obvious reasons. Sadly, once he accesses Zod's ship he finds out something even better: a super computer with a never ending data base with info from thousands of worlds and a Kryptonian Lazarus pit style pit that can transform corpses into "Deformities" AKA monsters. Such deformity is no other than Doomsday! the creature that defeated the Justice League and killed Superman!

Oops!

Someone really hates Superman.

Moving on to the second half of the film, we get what we've been waiting for: not just one, but two massive Batman V/S Superman battles all dramatic, all picture perfect, and all taken from comic book source material. Yes, the inner child will giggle only to find he's already an adult about to reach maximum nerdgasm.  Zack Snyder has proven to be a skilled director when it comes to picturing dramatic sequences, and BvS is the gold medal.

In the meantime  Luthor's ready to unleash the beast which he created so proudly: Doomsday! and we already know what that means. The film starts with a funeral and will inevitably end up with another. What makes you human? what makes me human? is it the ability to create? to read and write? to think? or is it none but the ability to sacrifice ourselves in order to protect those we love? The choice seems pretty clear to me, and believe you me, so it will for Superman.

As for the long awaited Superhero cameos, well, they're not that surprising to be honest, but they're there nonetheless. The one I really liked was when The Scarlet Speedster reached out Batman's dream telling him, urging him to form the Justice League, as his worst fears have all become the truth in the near future. Obviously, we have yet to see what those worst fears are but, well, in another sequence of Batman's knightmare we see these creatures that look a lot like Darkseid's minions, so...

Superheroes love too.

Wonder Woman for the win!

Overall, BVS is an entertaining movie, perhaps one of the best comic book films of the decade. While it may not be everyone's cup of tea, I'm certain a lot of people (mostly fans of the genre) will be pleased. Although, BvS has its ups and downs like any movie, the visual spectacle, the soundtrack and the little fan service here and there are perhaps its strongest features. Another minor and yet massive good thing about the film is credit to Bob Kane & Bill Finger for the creation of Batman. On the other hand, and this is a very personal opinion (you already know I'm a nobody, a loser and an idiot in the same person, so) Some things felt as if they lacked color. Some of the key scenes or even some of the characters important features, felt a bit too plastic, with no heart and emotions whatsoever. Something in the likes "here's your superhero movie, here's what superheroes do, thank you and good night"

Superman, being one of the two main characters in the film (sorry WW, but your solo movie is coming next year) is treated as "a character we all know too well" so that kinda compromises his development giving him little chance to attract the viewer. BvS' Superman is like "oh, they don't like me, meh! ", "oh, they like me, meh", "oh, there's Batman, gotta stop him!" However, this has nothing to do with Henry Cavill's performance. He is the Superman of our times, no doubt about it but, writers still need to step up their game with him. After all, he's the first superhero, the one who turned cartoonists & writers into Comic Book entrepreneurs! he deserves better! 

Wonder Woman suffers a similar fate on BvS, "Diana Prince, secret agent with her own agenda" and just like with Cavill's S Gal Gaddot's WW has writing issues because, well, there's really not much going on with her.

Burn!

Friends will be friends.

Anyways, Batman V Superman: Dawn of Justice, does the job it's meant to do: the establishment of the Detective Comics Cinematic Universe, AKA, DCCU. The new Batman is excellent, Ben Affleck was meant for the part (where are those Batffleck haters now?) and for fuck's sake! we've waited ages to see the bat suit done right! Superman is dead, hence he is the reason that will drive Wonder Woman & Batman to find other meta-humans to finally create the Justice League. Lex Luthor is bald and behind bars but with all the knowledge he acquired in Zod's wrecked ship supercomputer, will he remain that way? Aquaman, The Flash & Cyborg, we need your phone numbers for an important meeting.

Still, Zack Snyder has the balls no other film maker has ever had: messing up with the holiest of the holiest comic book stories of all time. 

Here's the ultimate movie trailer in full HD resolution:

Here's the Jimmy Kimmel "deleted scene" joke:
  

 The official trailer made with Lego figures: