Deranged

Obscure, yet a must watch.

 

It's been a long while since I reviewed B-movies. The never-ending list of retro Anime I had to post, kept me in the Japanese field for several years, and it will continue for a while, as I'm still revisiting some I haven't reviewed yet. Anyway, streaming services sometimes provide you with a list of interesting more obscure films from decades past. Such is the case of today's review, a horror masterpiece that went under the radar for decades until it was rediscovered and properly issued on VHS format in the early 1990s by American International Pictures, owned by Metro-Goldwyn-Mayer, thus fully available now on Prime Video. 

Allegedly, Deranged is based on the crimes of Ed Gein, an American murderer from Plainfield, Wisconsin. Legend has it, Psycho & The Texas Chainsaw Massacre where both based upon the crimes from this man. I'll spare the details so that you can enjoy the film, and Google details yourself.  In a nutshell, this Canuxploitation psychological horror story, tries to retell the story from the earlier murderer in the fictional character of Ezra Cobb, masterfully portrayed by Roberts Blossom. Cobb is a middle-aged man from the rural midwest near an unnamed town. 

 

Family dinner.

In-your face horror.

Considering this is a 1974 movie, most of the elements that describe the lead and his victims may be seen today as derivative or stereotypical. Yet, the storytelling is compelling. The locations, soundtrack and few characters translate the idea of being a loner in the middle of nowhere for too long. Roberts Blossom, a classically trained theater actor and poet, really brings to life the disgusting psychopathic aspects of Ezra Cobb, yet he also unveils the scars, fears and weaknesses of a character that at times seems to be the actual victim of the story.  You see, Ezra has seen no life outside his farm, and spent most of his life care-taking for his mother Amanda, a religious fanatic who managed to indoctrinate Ezra into abhorring women. Once his mother dies, he has no reason left to live. No one to talk to, no one to cook for, no one to see hours go by while hoping for a recovery that will never come. 

A whole year goes by, and Ezra starts having aural hallucinations from his mother demanding to be brought back home, and here is where the movie actually starts. Ezra brings the corpse of her late mother home, but seeing her skin has dried and deteriorated he decides to find "spare parts" in other bodies of recently deceased people. The obituary proves to be more helpful than LinkedIn when searching for a job, and so does the horror story unravels. 

Build-your-own mask.

 

Psychopaths also love boobs.

Deranged costed only US$20,000 to produce, a modest budget even for the 1970s. Yet, the true horror does not lay in the way victims are murdered but more into the process where Mr. Cobb works with, LinkedIn recruitment precision, to find the perfect match.  Graphic violence, while moderate, doesn't truly carry the horror we're looking for. Performances are key on this film, where even though characters don't do much beyond what they're needed for, they do reinforce our main character's psychological profile, and having Roberts Blossom as the lead, truly brings this criminal to life. 

The original cut of the film featured a scene where the lead killer feeds from a skull. The scene was removed from early releases, and it is sadly removed in the version you can stream on Prime Video, although the scene doesn't add anything new about the deranged Ezra, it graphically depicts his mental state.

Now, as above mentioned in the first paragraph, the story of Ed Gein has been taken to the small and big screen on several occasions, and now that streaming rules-supreme, Netflix did their own revisiting.On September 16, 2024, it was announced that the third season of Monster would focus on convicted murderer and suspected serial killer Ed Gein. On October 4,2024 it was confirmed that the season would be titled The Original Monster, exploring Ed Gein's life as the first "celebrity serial killer" and examining how true crime evolved into a pop culture phenomenon. Principal photography reportedly began the next month. The season was announced to be retitled to Monster: The Ed Gein Story in August 2025. 

 Here's the original TV Spot for Deranged:

 

Alice in Wonderland: An X-Rated Musical Fantasy

The first ever porn parody?

A few days ago a member from an old all things cult forum asked me if I had ever reviewed "Alice in Wonderland", and I was like, "sure mate, I'll give you the link later". To my surprise, there was no review, and then I realized why I hadn't made a review of such a rarity of a film: I didn't have the uncut version of the film and was still looking for it. The uncut version is, as you've probably guessed by now, the one that comes with the real sex scenes, which the original cut had plenty of, since the movie was intended to be the first hardcore porn film with a big budget and a story. Kristine DeBell, the star of the film, spent years denying the existence of a hardcore version of the film, in which she'd performed. By the time this film was released (1976), DeBell was beginning her career as a model and had recently become a Playboy bunny. 

According to David J. Hogan's book "The Wizard of OZ FAQ," Bill Osco, the producer of "Alice in Wonderland" had originally intended to star Kristine DeBell in an X-rated parody of The Wizard of OZ to be entitled "Dirty Dorothy." He eventually decided to do a take-off on Lewis Carroll's "Alice" books instead, probably because their rights were in the public domain and there would be less risk of a copyright infringement lawsuit than with the OZ books. 

So now, let's get down to business and review this classic musical everyone should watch before they die: Alice in Wonderland: An X-Rated Musical Fantasy.

Sweet little Alice, the virgin librarian.

Wonderland and some of its weirdos.

Alice (Kristine DeBell) enters in a world of wonder... but not the kind of wonder that you remember as a kid. The Mad Hatter, the White Rabbit, the Queen and others (even Tweedledee and Tweedledum) show Alice some things about her body -- and other people's bodies -- that might be quite wonderful. A tale of love and lust the likes you have never seen.

The story of how Kristine DeBell got involved with this is interesting. According to her, she was a model at the Ford Agency and saw that there were auditions for this film. She did not know what kind of movie it was, so she tried out and landed the part. Now, exactly what point she figured out what sort of movie it is is unclear, but we do know that she ended up going through with it. After all, making the movie only took ten days and a couple of fucks here and there.

Getting dry after a wet rescue.

Wonderland inhabitants show Alice how she can feel wonder too.

The producer was Bill Osco, probably best known at that point (and maybe even today) for "Flesh Gordon"(which we will review eventually). The director, Bud Townsend, had made a few horror films, "Terror House" and "Nightmare in Wax", which are largely forgotten today, even by fans of cult horror.

In "Alice", the songs are cheesy, but fit the theme of the movie. One song, "What's a Girl Like You Doing on a Knight Like This?" was pretty funny, and the others had similar themes going. The trial towards the end was well scripted, and fit very nicely into the world of Alice. The logic and humor were definitely accounted for. There is no denying it is an adult film, but one that has a certain level of intelligence.

Everyone knows how to party in Wonderland.

Even trials are an occasion to party.

What more can you say about a film like this? All I know is, for people who are used to adult films where the "plot" is just a 30-second lead-in to the sex, this one is going to overload you with plot and music. But, personally, I think there is something very special about this film and I do hope, in case you haven't watched it yet, that you do  come across the uncut version of the film that runs for 88 minutes instead of the 72 minute theatrical version. The DVD is currently out of print, but tracking it won't be that difficult. There's a double DVD version that features both the theatrical edition and the uncut version from which our review's been taken. 

In a 2012 brief interview by Metal Rules Radio, DeBell denied having performed any of the real sex scenes in Alice in Wonderland. However, a couple of scenes couldn't have possibly been acted by a body double, unless producers found an exact DeBell's doppelganger. In addition, she agrees she took part in the film because she was too young to care and/or notice what she was getting into.

In order to return to your world, you must learn the secrets of love.

Getting down to business.

DeBell's story following the film is even more interesting. She began dating producer Bill Osco, so through him, she got the lead in another cult (though not adult) film, "The Great American Girl Robbery" (1979). And who co-produced with Osco? None other than Chuck Russell, who went on to direct such films as "The Blob" and "Nightmare on Elm Street 3"! 

I don't see how Kristin DeBell's career could be wrecked by this film, as it was her first film. And Ronald Reagan's tiresome hypocrisies had yet to mar this land when it was released, but in a way he and his stooge Meese did affect Ms DeBell. When Meese was staging his anti-pornography commission (to distract people from his own criminal activities), Meese hired the services of an anti-porn activist named Judith Reisner. Reisner was obsessed with images she perceived as child pornography. She saw the "Alice" cover Ms DeBell did for Playboy and promptly announced she had scientifically proven that Ms DeBell was in fact a photo collage of parts from several grown women and the face of a ten year old. Yeah, right...

Anyway, DeBell escaped the world of adult films and b-movie schlock, appearing in "Meatballs" and being a mildly successful star ever since.

Blowing for some cum.

Back on Earth.

Plotwise, the film follows the stages of sexual discovery since Alice first becomes aware of her own body and what she can do to cum by herself. Then she goes into blowjobs, lesbian sex, and a whole lot more in order to be able to return to her real world and fully understand & fulfill her boyfriend's natural needs.

Alice in Wonderland: an X-Rated Musical Fantasy is what porn used to be, this is a true classic. I mean, it is an x-rated musical based on an actual book! There is a real plot to it and how many x-rated movies can boast that these days? This belongs in an exclusive short-list of true pornographic movie classics, including Debby Does Dallas, Deep Throat, and Behind the Green Door. I think the problem with "pornographic movies" these days is that it's all about the "pornographic" and not about the "movie". Alice in Wonderland has graphic depictions of sex, sure, but it is actually telling a story at the same time. Not one of the typical "Oh, Mr. Police Man, don't write me a ticket" plots, this takes it another step further and makes it a musical! Fabulous! If you want to see an example of "good" porn, this is one of the best. 

Oh Alice, I  knew you could swallow!

Kristine DeBell: All American beauty.

What makes this film such a delightful jaunt is its garden like setting. Partly filmed in the lush, natural splendor of Vancouver B.C.'s Stanley Park, the movie belies its pornographic roots. You don't come away feeling you've watched a sleazy skin flick. At this writing, I haven't viewed the triple XXX version. The extra sex footage tacked on afterward would, in all probability, disrupt the overall flow and remove the light, breezy atmosphere evident throughout.

Naturally, the Lewis Carroll version is the best way to curl up and explore Alice's adventures in Wonderland. However, for a time capsule representing 1970s' adult film archives, Alice in Wonderland: an X-Rated Musical Fantasy is worth following that white rabbit for a ribald ride full of mirthful mayhem. 

Here's the 2012 interview where DeBell talks briefly about the film:

Here's the movie trailer:

Power Rangers

it's morphin' time!

Go go Power what!? It seems that the latest trend in the movie industry is making a live action movie out of sacred items from the 90's. Mighty Morphin' Power Rangers were huge TV stars between 1993-1996. Every kid around the globe wanted a morpher & a zord and to this very day there's a varied line of toys and gadgets based upon the original Power Rangers. 

25 years later comes the unthinkable: a 21st century re imagined live action movie. Directed by Dean Israelite, written by John Gatins & Matt Sazama, and starred by Dacre Montgomery (Jason), Naomi Scott (Kimberly), RJ Cyler (Billy), Ludi Lin (Zack), Becky G. (Trini), Bryan Cranston (Zordon), and Elizabeth Banks (Rita Repulsa) Power Rangers is the updated version of a beloved 90's nostalgia act that will bring curious old school fans & newcomers (kids of course) together in an interesting mix of new & old. 

Zordon.

Five teenagers with attitude.

Now, how does this Power Rangers movie separate itself from the original Saban series? Considering, the source material was targeted at impressible 90's kids & teens there's a whole world of differences, and I personally thank the film producers for that because we're seeing the same superhero film being redone over and over every year, so thanks Mr. Israelite for your clever direction. However, there's still a fair amount of nods to the past. Obviously, the bigger the audience, the bigger the money, so instead of coming up with something entirely new, Power Rangers feels like the right amount of nostalgia & novelty.

What makes this new approach interesting, is the fact that this time we're shown the process you need to undergo in order to become a Power Ranger. The "fetch me five teenagers with attitude" 90's request remains the same, only this time things don't look so bright for our new set of heroes. The film opens with a superb origin storytelling about how the Power Rangers came to be the universe's only hope. Zordon (played by Bryan Cranston from Malcolm & Breaking Bad) is the original Red Ranger, and in what seems to be a treacherous act, we find out Rita Repulsa (masterfully played by Elizabeth Banks) was the original Green Ranger, thus her mostly green colored armor suit. Before things, go to hell, Zordon orders Alpha 5 to search for the new Power Rangers across the universe. 

Rita Repulsa.

Evil beauty.

In the original series the Power Rangers were 5 perfectly healthy and very succesful students from Angel Grove high school. They didn't need to train for anything, they were already very skilled in martial arts, gimnastics, science & team work. Also, they were good friends from day one. On the other hand, the film presents us a very different selection of troubled teenagers which are somehow more real than the earlier incarnation. Teens suffer, teens struggle, and to become a hero, there's a path of hit and miss that makes you grow, so I like that approach.

The Rangers are majorly based on their versions in Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993) (Jason, Kimberly, Billy, Zack, Trini), but also draw inspiration from various characters over the "Power Rangers" saga:

• Red Ranger - Jason Lee Scott is an athlete who suffered a career-ending injury (like the second MMPR Ranger Rocky DeSantos) and has a difficult relationship with his father (like Wesley Collins in Time Force)

• Pink Ranger - Kimberly Hart is a former diva who did something wrong and wants to make up for it (similar to Summer Landsdown in RPM)

• Blue Ranger - Billy Cranston is a geeky black kid ( like Ethan James in Dino Thunder and Noah Carver in Power Rangers Megaforce) he's also autistic, hence the color.

• Black Ranger - Zack Taylor is based on Adam Park

• Yellow Ranger - Trini Kwan is pretty much an original character but her lesbian condition may somewhat have been inspired by David Yost (the original blue ranger in MMPR) who happened to be gay and had trouble during the series production until he called it quits.

Hi, I'm Alpha 5.

Dude, this new drug is rad!

These new rangers add a more meaningful touch to what it means to be a self awared person. Subjects like bullying, autism, LGBT rights and second chances are a constant in their lives and allow the characters to be more relatable, unlike what happened in the original series with the rangers' perfect lives. What the hell! Even Rita Repulsa's vendetta has meaning behind all the predictable one liners. 

Now, Power Rangers the movie, not only updates character development, the Ranger suits have also been upgraded from bulletproof spandex, to crystal armor, and so are Zords updated to look far more Transformer like (that is Michael Bay Transformers) While I originally hated the new suits/zords I think they're OK for the message the film conveys and after watching it, I changed my mind and totally understood the science behind the new suits. 

Fuck you all!

Superhero pose!

Now as for homage nods, dude, there are a lot of easter eggs throughout the film, here's a list of the few I noticed:

• The Angel Grove High logo in the film is the same one used in Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993).

• Bryan Cranston, who plays Zordon in the film, previously voiced the monsters Twin Man and Snizzard in Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993). Additionally, the first Blue Ranger in this film, Billy Cranston, was named after Cranston himself.

• In Trini's bedroom, there is a window that features a circle with a tiger's head; this was the Yellow Ranger's original Power Coin design in Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993).

• At one point the Yellow Ranger Trini wears a shirt that reads 1973. This was the year that the original Trini Thuy Trang was born.

• When Colt Wallace tries to hurt Billy in the school hallway and fails after a unsuccessful headbutt, Billy calls him by the name Skullovich. In Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993), one of the bullies the Rangers dealt with in school was named Skull, short for Skullovich.

• The Rangers having their visors removed was taken from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie (1995) (scenes deleted), Power Rangers Lightspeed Rescue (2000) and Power Rangers Ninja Storm (2003).

• When Goldar is being constructed from the gold, Rita Repulsa ( Elisabeth Banks ) say the infamous line: Make my monster grow.

• When the Zords charge into battle, the theme song (Go Go Power Rangers written & sung by Ron Wasserman) from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers: The Movie (1995) is heard, and this is clearly the "shut up and take my money" moment of the film. Man! that theme song is rad! I still play it whenever I can!

Goldar is actually made of gold now.

Are you talking to us?

• The watch that Billy wears is the watch from Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993), which Billy made in that show so that the Rangers can communicate with each other/teleport to Zordon.

• When Trini's brothers question the identity of the Yellow Ranger, they refer to the Yellow Ranger as a "he," to which Trini replies by asking how they know if the Yellow Ranger is a "he." This is likely a reference to the fact that the Yellow Ranger in Zyuranger, the "Super Sentai" series that the original "Power Rangers" show was based on, was actually a male.

• Throughout the movie, all the Power Rangers wear something (clothes/jewelry) that is their Ranger color.

• Amy Jo Johnson and Jason David Frank, who were Kimberly and Tommy in Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993), have cameo roles in this film as Angel Grove citizens. They are seen wearing their Ranger colors (pink and green) from that show.

• A mid credits scene depicts a missing Tommy in detention and shows a green jacket, only furthering the nod to having the green ranger in the sequel.

• When Rita is defeated by the Megazord, she is last seen hurling to the moon and she starts to smile. In Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993), Rita has her lair on the moon.

• When Rita attacks the Rangers in their normal form you can see sparks appear at the spots where they are hit. In Mighty Morphin Power Rangers (1993) any hit, whether it was against the Rangers or the villains, resulted in sparks shooting out.

Overall, Power Rangers is a very entertaining Sci-Fi movie that doesn't take itself too seriously. Despite the original show being campy, this film introduces a new darker world that will clearly be expanded in several sequels. Recommended to old school MMPR fans and to any sci-fi enthusiast. A good film for everyone.

Here's the movie trailer:

Trick 'r' Treat

Sam will be your guide.

Only a few days until Halloween night! and what could be better than watching horror films for pumpkin season? Our previous entry was all about Samhein too but today's entry takes us into another level of film making, a true independent horror masterpiece the likes we haven't seen in ages. Trick 'r' Treat (not to be confused with 1986's Trick or Treat. See? spelling matters!) is perhaps the only horror film worth watching made in the 21st century (along with The Ring & Final Destination) Annabelle? Paranormal Activity? The Conjuring? Seriously?! those aren't horror films! those are horrific to watch films! fuck them all! fuck their poser fans!

Anyway, Trick 'r' Treat is a 2007 film written & directed by Michael Dougherty, produced by Bryan Singer (of X-Men & Superman Returns fame) and starred by Anna Paquin (Rogue in the X-Men franchise).

Hi, I'm Sam.

And I love Halloween.

Ah, Halloween… my favorite time of the year. It isn't so much the festivities taking place that excites me as it's the feeling in the air once October comes. That palpable sensation you get seeing jack-o-lanterns grimly lit faces, kids trick-or-treating in the streets and the aesthetics of fall surrounding you slowly giving way to winter. I think it must hold a special place in everyone, if for nothing else but purely nostalgic reasons. Mike Dougherty is certainly one of those people, as is evidenced by his incredible horror anthology Trick 'r Treat. For a holiday that revels in films of a horrific nature, there sure are a scant few of them that take place on the actual day itself. Dougherty's film is the celluloid embodiment of that je ne sais quoi that has made Halloween such an alluring holiday for generations of kids (and adults) alike.

As I said, Trick 'r Treat is a horror anthology which interweaves tales that all take place on Halloween night, similar to such genre classics as Creepshow and Tales from the Darkside. A costumed couple learns to respect tradition… the hard way, a group of girls head out into the woods for a "howling" good party, the local school principal has a (literal) taste for blood, four kids attempting to pull off a holiday "trick" end up becoming "treats", and a cantankerous old man gets a visit from a holiday visitor looking to settle a decades-old grudge.

Oh C'mon! Lose your virginity already!

Halloween is a great night for my first time.

To say anymore than that would spoil the fun in watching the film, as these stories are best digested when viewed on an empty mind. The twists are less predictable than most horror films manage these days; half the fun is wondering just where the hell these characters are going to end up. The one constant throughout the film is a costumed, pint-sized little guy named Sam, who does his best to remind people why they should take great care in adhering to the traditions set forth hundreds of years ago for All Hallows Eve. The film is richly seeped in tradition, reminding the audience of just why we celebrate the fabled holiday in the first place. It manages to be effectively creepy and blood-soaked, yet it never goes over-the-top with gratuitous gore. There is also a very obvious helping of black comedy strewn throughout the film, which thankfully never gives way to the self-parody so many horror films feel the need to indulge in.

I think the most impressive aspect of this film is the incredible attention that has been paid to detail. Every single shot of the film is beautifully framed and composed, often looking more like a cryptic painting than a frame of film. The austere trappings of Mr. Kreeg's dark house, the ghostly palette of the rock quarry, the incredible shape-shifting sequence around a roaring fire in the woods… everything here is gorgeous. That aesthetic, married with the spot-on performances and realistic dialogue, give the film an organic feel that never relies on cheese or parody to break tension. The cinematography by Glen MacPherson is so lush it manages to make you feel like you're a part of the celebration. For someone who is as big a fan of the Halloween holiday as I am, this was especially important to see done right. Too often when a film actually does take place on the holiday it lacks the depth that is presented here.

Beautiful decoration.

Kid-friendly neighbors.

For such a large ensemble cast, there isn't any one performance that stands out above the rest – everyone here is perfectly cast. I even enjoyed Anna Paquin as the "virgin" of the female group, and she's not always someone I'm crazy about. Perhaps my favorite role is that of Mr. Kreeg, played superbly by veteran character actor Brian Cox. His look was inspired directly from my favorite director, John Carpenter, and there are a couple of well-placed nods to his work that were highly amusing. Also providing great support throughout the film is newcomer Quinn Lord who plays Sam, the little sack-headed minion who "stitches" the film's stories together.

The film was originally slated to be released in October 2007 for a Halloween release. Warner Bros., without explanation or reason, pulled the film from the schedule and no reschedule date was announced. One reason might have been that Saw IV (2007) was slated for release around the same time and Warner Bros. did not want to compete against it in fears of a big opening against them. Another possible reason the film was buried by the studio was that it was possible fallout from the box office disappointment of Superman Returns (2006), which was co-written by Trick 'r Treat writer/director Michael Dougherty and both produced and directed by Bryan Singer, whose production company produced this film. There was brief talk that the film would finally be released around Halloween 2008 and possibly early 2009 but neither release ever materialized. The film was finally released straight to DVD in October 2009.

Slutty party.

Sexy boobs.

Trick 'r' Treat had many title changes before filming began. Originally titled Season's Greetings (also the name of the short film), it was changed because it sounded too much like a Christmas film. Then it was called Halloween Terrors, Jack O' Lantern Tales, October the 31st, and Trick or Treat. The final title was kept but since there was already a movie of the same name out (our previous review), they changed the spelling to Trick 'r Treat.  

The name of the character Sam is derived from Samhain, the ancient Celtic festival of the dead from which modern-day Halloween is derived. Despite having been portrayed as such in this film and several other works, Samhain is not a deity or other personage of ancient Celtic polytheism; it is only the name of the celebration. However, the idea of being either a deity or other personage dates back to at least the late first century, largely thanks to an Irish bishop named Cormac mac Cuilennàin and his book "Sanas Cormaic" (Irish Gaelic for "Cormac's Narrative"), which had identified Samhain as such. 

Father & son carving, cute!

Say cheese!

Overall, an excellent horror film that offers nothing but pure entertaining, so what are you waiting for?

Here's the movie trailer:

Deadpool

 

Not as nasty as media tells you but, WTH.

In a world covered with comic book media & merchandise frenzy a new film based upon another character from another comic book doesn't seem to be much of a thing. Or is it? Deadpool has been around since the early 90's and to everyone familiar with the character they're pretty damn sure that he is neither a superhero nor a vigilante. He's a merchant, a gun for hire, so having a comic book film with an R rating is nothing but the right way to do it. The problem is, (if there's ever a problem with it) is that Deadpool has become so massively popular since the arrival of massive Comic Cons and social networks that it is almost impossible not to find yourself checking your -insert favorite social network here- timeline with something either remotely or closely related to the man in black & red (or is it red & black?) And oh boy! let's not forget about the hundreds of thousands Harley Quinn worshipers waiting for the Suicide Squad movie!

The question is, have we had enough of Deadpool already? or Do we need a big screen movie of a character that's become an internet meme and Comic Con fan favorite just because it's what's hot in your silly timeline? I don't know, and as the premise of this humble blog states: discover the answer by yourself, our reviews and opinions are merely hints at something that will become greater when you're a part of it.

I for one, I'm a big Deadpool fan. As a matter of fact, some of his stories are the most entertaining I've read in ages! (Suicide Kings, Wade Wilson's War, Merc with a Mouth, etc) and the news of movie about himself made happy enough to forget my "I'm sick of overrated superhero movie" sickness.  

Listen, Green Lantern & Wolverine Origins gave me cancer.

Oh yeah! Sex in a Marvel Comics inspired flick!

The Deadpool film has been out for almost a week now, but the motto of SPAM Alternative is to deliver unbiased honest to Satan reviews. Nobody's paying us, and we're not a shitty advertisement site so, here goes nothing:

There is a word I don't like that perfectly describes what the overall feeling of watching Deadpool is: Hype. Although trailers, ads and social network campaigns promised a film that would rock your socks off, I'm sorry to tell you that this is not the film that would do that (unless, you're an inexperienced casual movie goer with little to no cinema & comic book knowledge) The gory action scenes, the pun intended jokes, foul language and some mild sex & nudity grant you nothing, because there are hundreds of films that rely on those tricks to keep you sat for an hour and a half, so the sense of "freshness" some may be expecting here is nothing but an illusion.Maybe I'm being too much of a purist perfectionist here so don't mind me.

Still, the film tries to stay as close as possible to source material and it comes packed with massive easter eggs comic book fans will love (and superhero movie fans will pretend to understand while they're googling them)  The plot is derivative at most. Wade Wilson a low life merchant, falls in love with a hooker and all of a sudden discovers that he's got Cancer metastasis and he will inevitably die sooner than later. Suddenly, the wild promise of a magnificent cure that will cure his cancer while turning him into a mutant seems like the only way out.

You can be an X-Men Deadpool.

Can we go home now?

Of course things go wicked wrong and Deadpool promises to find the man who turned him into an unfuckable avocado. Obviously, Deadpool means are nowhere close to being those of heroes, so enter Colossus & Negasonic Teenage Warhead (the only X-Men available because the studio couldn't afford more, according to Deadpool himself haha) Their goal is to convince Deadpool to become an X-Men but you already know, our merc with a mouth doesn't give a shit about that. 

The only weakness this film may have is that it tries too hard to bring new into a genre that is more about the merchandise than the quality of the art. Deadpool is the main character and well, every other character looks and feels completely diminished in terms of developing their own personalities. For instance, Colossus (Stefan Kapicic) goes from being one of the greatest X-Men to become a do goody nanny with morals. Megasonic is the cliched teen who hates everything and wants to be some place else, and to make matters worse the enemy, the one reason this revenge movie exists is, well, too weak to be likable and credible. Ajax (Ed Skrein) is a scientist who happens to have the same powers Wade has. Anything else? not really, oh! Deadpool calls him Francis and he hates that.

Yes, I'm Canadian & I love Vancouver!

Let's do this Ripley!

The jokes are there, some are pretty good and some are not. Whenever there's an action sequence you'll find a good joke, but when action isn't going on, jokes aren't really that entertaining. Movies that rely heavily on one liners & jokes become dated pretty quickly (think of the Austin Powers trilogy) and since the plot & support cast are weaker than a Toynami Robotech toy, I don't think this film will live up to the hype that's been built around. Nevertheless, the action packed scenes are there and Ryan Reynolds is the main star here, so if you're able to skip that, then you're ready to enjoy this film. 

The fourth wall is also present on this film in several films but clearly the most unforgettable moments and jokes are those related to Ryan Reynolds acting career, the Green Lantern movie, The Wolverine Origins film and some other pun intended jokes that are related to the comic book world in general. Also, the soundtrack seems to follow the idea established by Guardians of the Galaxy: Play only oldies but goodies. Can you believe Wade Wilson's favorite band is Wham! ?

Showgirls!

AT & T (ass, tits & twat)

Nevertheles, the mere fact that Deadpool got made is perhaps the greatest artistic triumph this film achieves. Little credit should be given to 20th Century Fox, as they had zero faith in the success of a Deadpool movie. To put things into perspective, Ryan Reynolds fought for this film back in 2004 when Blade: Trinity was released. Reynolds and co. (which is why Deadpool jokes about blowing Wolverine's balls in early scenes) went to shoot test footage that was then leaked online by Reynolds himself (he claims to be 70% sure of that) because Fox had no intentions to release it to the public. Finally, after years and years of begging to the studio and the overwhelming positive responses of the test footage from the public, Fox didn't even tell Reynolds and co. that the film was green lit. They had to find out online like the rest of us plebeians. If that sounds bad, Fox even cut their budget by $7 million at the last minute, which caused the writers to scratch some action sequences that make you feel the entire film was already spoiled in the trailers.
 
Deadpool now has the biggest opening weekend in the month of February (surpassing Fifty Shades of Grey), the biggest opening weekend for 20th Century Fox (surpassing all the X-Men films), and the biggest opening weekend for an R rated film EVER (surpassing The Matrix: Reloaded). With all that being said, Deadpool is an entertaining film that works mainly because of Reynolds himself. His comedic skills pay off gloriously as the titular character, who gives so many quips in one instance that some jokes will be missed. Of course, credit should be given to the writers too (AKA: The Real Heroes Here), and it's impressive that this is Tim Miller's directorial debut. The action sequences and pacing are so good that you'd think this came from a veteran director.

From the ingenious opening credits to the subversive ending, Deadpool constantly upends clichés and tropes you're used to seeing in superhero flicks in the past few years. What's great here is the filmmakers had something weird and perverse and just went with it. Jokes about pedophilia, pegging, and sex run rampant, but it's never really dark, despite the mature subject matter. On top of that, it's also very refreshing to see a pansexual superhero in such a big studio film. It's unheard of these days. Fox and other studios, learn from this success. It's not the fact that a hard R-rated film can do well, it's that Deadpool also happens to be very entertaining , most likely because you, Fox, actually gave the filmmakers the creative freedom to do whatever the hell they wanted.

Yeah! fuck me Wade!

Ladies & Gentlemen, Chastity!

The scene after the credits shows Deadpool in a bathrobe, making fun of you, the viewer, for sticking around for so long. He also talks about the sequel, and says it will feature Cable. Then he makes a few jokes about the casting, and pokes at other movies that usually tease future movies in these scenes.

Overall, Deadpool is an entertaining film that maybe works better with people who are not really hardcore fans of the character. I for one, left the theater with mixed feelings because I know my Deadpool, the film could have been way wilder. 

Do you like Tabasco sauce? the hell I do! I love Chili! and my favorite Tabasco is the hottest one: "Habanero". Well, Deadpool was only the "Mild Tabasco"

Here's the movie trailer:

And if you're too lazy to find the easter eggs yourself, here some guy saved you time: