Star Wars Episode IX The Rise of Skywalker

Time to say good-bye.

 
"Hey!, it's only a movie" ("Notebook: Hey, it's only a movie, says Lucas - but who's listening to him?", 2011)
 

It's funny how Disney spent months saying bitter fanboys trolled The Last Jedi so that audiences would think it was a bad movie, and two years later they themselves make a move that screams fanservice, nostalgia and playing it safe. Had The Last Jedi not being the bummer it was, I'm sure Mickey Mouse would have continued the "subvert expectations" concept boldly defended by Rian Johnson, and yet they didn't. 

With a large budget, one has to wonder who aids Disney into hiring people who can't direct, write or produce something worth remembering beyond toy aisles. Obviously, J.J. Abrams had things going south even before he replaced  Colin Trevorror as the director. Moreover what he envisioned two films earlier had to be retconned with surgeon's hands.

Star Wars Episode IX The Rise of Skywalker is a film that may or may not suffer from the divisiveness caused by the earlier episode. People who loved having their expectations subverted will probably dislike this final entry, as essentially J.J. decided to pay Johnson back the same way he did in the previous episode: by keeping what's substantial & wiping out remaining secrets he (Abrams) proposed in Episode VII The Force Awakens. 

But what does this mean to audiences?

Stunning visuals of bad weather.

Stunning visuals of bad weather warfare.

Well, if you're like me, and didn't love Johnson's take, you will like Abrams' better. Let's face it, the new trilogy didn't have much of a story to tell. New characters and new stories do resemble, or try to resemble the best moments the original trilogy had, and perhaps that's the main problem this new trio of flicks has. Lifelong fans may have been misled by the constant homage Episode VII paid to the original holy trilogy. The sequel tried to bring new ideas to the table, and while I openly bashed the movie in both my review, and when discussing it with friends, I can say my opinion has positively changed a lot thanks to the re-watch effect.

Running two hours and 20 minutes, IX is a fast lane roller-coaster ride where the action, revelations and answers happen with speed. At times I felt there could have been more movies to explain a few things better. However, I think this is the only possible grand finale the new trilogy could have had. So, while it's not a masterpiece (none of the films from this trilogy are), it delivers enough content to play it safe, and satisfy the most fans.

Rey is the ultimate Jedi.

Is it Kylo Ren or Ben Solo?

OK boomer, what is Episode IX about?

After the resistance is defeated by the First Order, the good guys went in hiding, while Rey continues her Jedi training. However, a secret message coming from the outer realms, reveals Darth Sidious is still alive!, while no one calls him THAT on the film, Palpatine is the son of a bitch that helped build the First Order from the dark in order to conquer the galaxy once more. Moreover, he created Snoke and was behind Ben Solo's transformation into Kylo Ren. Now that Ren is the new supreme leader, he decides to track down the Sith lord in order to defeat him and become the ultimate evil in the galaxy.

On the other hand General Leia Organa knows the threat this bastard poses, and sets her own team to find the location of this ultimate evil. Fortunately, the resistance has the extremely talented Rey on their side. Honestly, Rey is the most powerful Jedi ever seen on film. She's so skilled, she can overpower any threat within miles of distance. Unless, it's her dark side equivalent she's fighting against. Kylo Ren gets in the way of the resistance, namely Rey all the time. Unsurprisingly, both resistance and first order will meet once more for a final  battle. Only this time the first order will have the advantage of a powerful Sith ally.

The first hour feels like the direct sequel to Episode VII, as if nothing of relevance took place in Episode VIII, which feeds my theory that J.J. Abrams didn't like how Rian Johnson handled the sequel, and like Kylo Ren's restored helmet, J.J. picked up all the pieces left, and carefully bandaged everything to build a new movie.

This is our movie!

Psst, we're here too!

From here on there will be subtle spoilers, so stop right here if you haven't seen it yet.

The new trilogy lacked a grand story to tell, and it shows throughout every film. The Force Awakens was a remake of Episode IV, and The Last Jedi was the most original out of the bunch, yet it didn't have a story to tell. I for one, see this new trilogy as an opportunity for the Disney company to sell Star Wars toys with their label on it. Throughout the saga we get a lot of action scenes, dogfights, lightsaber duels, new force powers, modern visually stunning scenes but, and this is the big but of this new saga: Not enough story, undeveloped characters, overpowered characters, no balance! no balance whatsoever. 

The previous trilogies were balanced. Main characters, antagonists, and secondary characters were all there for a reason, and the reason or reasons, were clearly explained, allowing the viewer to feel the need for these characters to exist in each film. The new trilogy took the main features of classic characters and poured them into new characters that were nothing, but a weaker, unfinished,  and underdeveloped version of the original characters. The fact that Rey is now the grandniece of Darth Sidious creates a big hole where fans would ask themselves "Wait, so did this bad motherfucker have a family with kids and everything?". In addition, his survival, and time spent in the shadows building The Final Order (his new army of clones) make Darth Vader's redemption  a lot more irrelevant in the canon. He did redeem himself and saved his son from certain death but ultimately, didn't stop the forces of evil from securing their galactic dictatorship. Moreover, The Resistance was completely clueless about their true enemy, although they had Leia Organa & Luke Skywalker, the two surviving Jedi knights on their side! What the hell? Not even The First Order knew about Palpatine's survival and plot. 

Dark Rey.

The first order's finest.

Let's set that aside and move on to the other characters. Kylo Ren the "I want to be badder than my granddad" tryhard, finally gets his redemption and returns to the light side as Ben Solo with the aid of Leia's final sacrifice. Obviously, this is a required Mcguffin, in order to allow Rey to even the odds against the powerful Emperor, and speaking of Mcguffins, the way to access the emperor's secret planet is via a wayfinder (they were spoiled long before the movie premiered) a two of a kind Sith artifact that gives the exact location of Sidious hideout. In addition, there's a Sith dagger that was also spoiled long ago. The dagger provides the same info as the Wayfinder.

Now, let's move on to Fanservice. If bringing Palpatine back from the death isn't enough, don't worry! J.J.'s got you covered!. IX features tons and tons of ripped off quotes from the previous trilogies. From "I got a bad feeling about this" to "The dark side of the force is a pathway to many abilities, some consider to be unnatural". In addition, there are the unexpected scenes that will take fanservice to the next level. Particularly one scene where a young Luke is training his young sister Leia. How ironic is that? a CGI scene that is more emotional than real scenes. On the other hand, the whole Reylo garbage some fans have been pushing through memes and fan fiction all over the internet, sadly pays them off with the lamest scene in the film. BECAUSE, in the previous films Kylo Ren & Rey were allegedly attracted to each other. I always saw them as enemies. One wanted the other turning to the dark side, while the other wanted the exact opposite. I guess, under J.J.'s eye that's reason enough for you to fall in love with your sworn enemy.

Leia, our princess.

Lando's back from geriatric care management.

Character wise I'd say this is Rey's movie. She's on the most scenes, and we get to see her do a lot of things, and I really liked that because she's my favorite new character. On IX she (Daisy Ridley) delivers some of her best acting in several emotional scenes. The fight scenes were she's in, are incredibly well staged and visually stunning. She is truly a convincing character, perhaps the most powerful Jedi knight out of the franchise.

Moreover, characters that weren't popular had far less onscreen time than they previously did. Namely, Rose Tico, and the new characters (Zorii Bliss, Jannah Klaud, Commander D'acy) are all forgettable save for Babu Frik due to the role he plays when aiding the resistance. Other characters play minor roles and don't really add much to the story, save for being there in the background doing stuff while the main characters take the lead.

Droid wise, C-3PO & R2D2 return to spend a more crucial role on this film. Especially 3PO who serves as the vessel to unravel Palpatine's location. D-O, the new droid that looks like a hair dryer, is there to sell toys. Which reminds me of The Knights of Ren! Who finally show up in the movie to make you want to buy more toys! As action figures, I'm sure they look great but plot wise, they're as useless as a Stormtrooper playing darts.

C-3PO gets into the action.

Rebel, rebel!

The Rise of Skywalker was clearly a difficult movie to make. Perhaps, the most difficult of the decade. A significant portion of SW fans wasn't shy about sharing their thoughts and views on social media. Times have changed. Today people don't need official media reviewers, they got their opinions, their own sites, and this poses a new threat for film making. Remember when people bashed Sonic The Hedgehog's design? Well, they listened and fixed it. Same with Star Wars. The Last Jedi really turned the tide for Disney, and after all their futile attempts to say Episode VIII was well received, the final episode is all about listening to the fans, which lastly are the reason these movies are made. IX is the best final chapter we could ever ask for despite its ups and downs. 

Music wise, John Williams has always been the secret character hidden in the background of the franchise. Key classic compositions are brought back in the movie in order to foster the hype for nostalgia. Nevertheless, the new compositions aren't as stunning as what he did in the previous episodes, which is by no means implying his new work is bad or mediocre. 

Knights of Lame, ahem! Ren!

The real bad guy.

The third and final act in IX is the expected duel between Rey, Ben Solo & Darth Sidious. It is here where the final revelation takes place. Ben & Rey form a dyad in the force. If the word sounds strange, In sociology, a dyad is a group of two people, the smallest possible social group. As an adjective, "dyadic" describes their interaction. The pair of individuals in a dyad can be linked via romantic interest, family relation, interests, work, partners in crime, or on this case, the force. Palpatine knows this is an opportunity for revitalizing his agonizing body and he sucks out the force energy of Reylo. As soon as he's ready to take matters on his own, he throws Ben Solo into a large fall, just like Vader did 30 years ago with him. Rey is exhausted and her only chance for survival is to summon the spirit of all the previous Jedi before her. "Be with me" takes a whole new meaning. Her first scene in the movie starts with that phrase and we can see why at the climax. 

Overall, a decent finale but not a perfect movie. However,  I do salute J.J. Abrams effort for putting things in perspective. He even took some of the previous episode ideas and respectfully turned them into a fitting finale.

On a lighter note, let's hope this meme is the last one:

No one's ever really gone.

Here's the teaser trailer:

Here's the second trailer:

Here's the final trailer:

Here's a movie clip:

Here's the revealing preview clip:

The red carpet show:

Star Wars, Episode VII The Force Awakens

The most important movie saga of all time returns.

1983 was the year that marked the last entry in the Star Wars saga. Later, in 1999 George Lucas would begin the (controversial) prequel trilogy with Episode I: The Phantom Menace. I was there, as I've been in every single Star Wars avant premiere my age and pockets could afford. I was born in 1981, so the way I experienced the original trilogy was through the tele and VHS rentals. In 1997, with the "Special Editions" in theaters I experienced the updated original trilogy in theaters. Star Wars is a significant part of my existence. To me, it stands for innocence, family values, survival, breaking through, fostering either  your strengths or weaknesses, and finding out that the only way of growing up a rather decent human being, has a lot to do with understanding pain. Pain teaches the most valuable lesson in life: life is a balance between the dark side and the light, just like Star Wars has always been...

Last night we had a blast, my wife frigging loved it, my friends, totally loved it, the people in the theater were blown away. What about me? I knew, I just knew it would be one of the most amazing (not to say the most amazing) birthday celebrations I ever had. A true Star Wars fan knows what to do when it comes to resisting temptation, and by temptation I mean spoilers, leaked plots and leaked stuff of all sorts. Before last night, I didn't give a shit about all these idiotic moronic motherfuckin' Star Wars connoisseurs who swore they knew beforehand what the film was going to be about. However, there was this forum (which I won't mention here) which did got right some stuff they spoiled and here comes the real question Do you really want to miss the joy of being surprised from start to finish watching a Star Wars movie? No, no you don't, you will not spoil the movie for me, these are not the spoilers you're looking for.  Browsing for spoilers is like going to a rock concert and instead of enjoying the show, you just spend the whole time taking pictures and recording crappy videos which no one, not even your friends will give a fuck about.

New heroes rise.

So do the enemies.

Star Wars, Episode VII The Force Awakens, directed by J.J. Abrams and produced by Disney. George Lucas didn't have much to do with it, he kinda walked away from his creation for good here you can read his statement:

The issue was, ultimately, they looked at the stories and they said, 'We want to make something for the fans.' People don't actually realize it's actually a soap opera and it's all about family problems - it's not about spaceships. So they decided they didn't want to use those stories, they decided they were going to do their own thing so I decided, 'Fine.... I'll go my way, and I let them go their way.' George Lucas, (CBS This Morning)

After a lot of stupid speculations in the likes of "Luke turned to the dark side, he is Kylo Ren" or "They cloned Darth Vader", "The Emperor didn't die", "Darth Plagueis is alive" and forums created merely for the purpose of pushing Disney to embrace the expanded universe and consider it canon, all I can tell you, because I truly care about maintaining your Star Wars experience a surprise, is that every single internet theory was nothing but crap, bullshit, lies, and delusions of grandeure. Star  Wars returns to our world safe and sound. As a matter of fact it returns safer and sounder than ever. What I saw, what I felt was 12 parsecs superior than what happened to me when I was waiting in line for Episode I.  Hopefully, my fellow readers, I truly expect not to deliver a biased review, I want a correct review, the one this film deserves.

These stormtroopers don't miss.

Run for your life!

Ahem!, let's begin. Episode VII happens thirty something years after the fall of the empire. Legendary characters are there safe and sound. The story although not fully explained (Episode VIII & IX are on their way) is about the remnants of the galactic empire, these space Nazies now go by the name of "The First Order"  their goal as it wasn't clear already is to destroy the republic at all cost and restore the power of the dark side through a new Sith lord that goes by the name of Kylo Ren. The rebel alliance now goes by the name of The Resistance, suggesting they've been struggling with the first order longer than what the film shows. The jedi order has ceased to exist. Luke Skywalker is nowhere to be found. Of course he has reasons, he's a Jedi knight! But what good is the resistance without such a powerful ally? Well, they're well trained, as a matter of fact they have an ace pilot that goes by the name of Poe Dameron. Leia Organa is there, C-3PO is there, R2D2 is there and a lot of classic rebel characters are there too (trying not to spoil it for you) The thing is, without the Jedi to balance the force, there will be chaos, there will be destruction and there will be a  lot of suffering.

George Lucas has always described Star Wars as a soap opera, a family in constant conflict in an unbalanced universe.  In that sense, Episode VII is a true Star Wars movie. The never ending space battles, the amazing ships, serviceable droids and light saber fights are all there. But Star Wars is also a lot of fun with pun intended jokes that only true Star Wars fans will get. Episode VII has a lot of that too. 

The faces of evil.

I will finish what you started.

What if you've never seen a Star Wars movie before? Well, I hate to break it to you but if your plan is a complete experience you're mandatory required to watch the previous episodes. Also, I suggest to go to a psychologist, something's broken there. In this new film, the concept of the force (as shown in the trailers, so this is not a spoiler) seems to be a forgotten tale that has somewhat turned into a myth rather than a fact. When Han Solo utters "it's true, all of it" he's clearly explaining it to the new characters, characters which weren't even born by the time Luke & co took down the empire. Luke Skywalker is also a sort of a fictional character to those who weren't there. Nevertheless, Solo & Leia know he is real and top priority when it comes to dealing with the return of the dark side. 

As stated above Luke Skywalker as gone in hiding. The resistance is running short on both manpower & time. The first order is clearly not as forgiving as the empire once was. They will destroy & murder first, then they will ask the questions.  Is Skywalker running away because he's afraid of the First Order? If you're a Star Wars fan you know what happens when you're taken by fear, just bare in mind, Skywalker was so powerful he didn't need to finish Darth Vader to defeat him.

"Chewie, we're home"

"I'm no one"

The newly introduced planet of Jakku, seems to be the new Tatooine. People hate it as it's a dessert planet were there's nothing but debris and hundreds of miles of sand. However, this is the planet where Rey lives. In order to survive, she's become a scavenger like many in her planet. Seeing her appear in every trailer and TV ad, already suggested she was going to have a big role in the new Star Wars trilogy. But, who is she?, who are her parents?, is she an orphan girl? how does she get her hands in the Millenium Falcon? How does her path crosses with Finn's?

The first order has a mission, they're looking for something that they thing is key to bring down the republic for once and for all. Could the resistance be looking for the same exact thing? is it Anakin Skywalker's lightsaber which we've alredy seen in the trailers? how the hell did someone recovered it? Not even Luke had it when he lost it to Vader during The Empire Strikes Back most revealing moment. Earlier concepts of Star Wars (even before Episode IV was released) reveal that the original idea Lucas had, was the search for a powerful artifact that allowed whoever who owned it to have an unlimited amount of power. Could such legendary light saber hold something we yet don't know? Anakin's lightsaber passed onto Luke and then he lost but, a new character (nope, not telling) recovered it and kept safe for the future of the universe. Is it possible that this lightsaber will be passed on to new characters? Promo pictures and TV ads have already shown Finn wielding it. Could he be a new Jedi? is he the son of Lando Calrissian & Leia Organa (another stupid theory by the way)

BB-8 steals the show, he's highly emotional!

Fuck you all, I came here to kill Sith style!

Now, Episode VII is not only good guys versus bad guys, good guys always win and stuff like that. There's a brutally unexpected plot twist that will leave you half happy (because you watched a new Star Wars movie) and half sad because of what happens. The new action sequences where the force is used are truly incredible. Add to that the excellent sound effects that make you feel someone is using the force. There are moments where son of a bitch Kylo Ren will use it, and the sound engineer truly gets into your ears telling you "this is how the force sounds you little pussy" that is something entirely new, and although it is not that big, it is brand new. The lightsaber fights have spectacular light sounds that weren't even conceived this good in the prequel trilogy. Space battle lovers will also be very satisfied, you will see the X-Wing fighters fly like never before.

Some action sequences are so overwhelming that you're like "my god, there's too much going on, my eyes can't take it" And that's a very good thing I think, because you get the "I'm tired of war" vibes quite clearly.  BB-8 & Poe Dameron's mission will gladly remind you of Episode IV. In the past I never watched a J.J. Abrams film. As a matter of fact I didn't even bother watching his take on Star Trek. Nevertheless, he pulls a fine job here. He knows what old school fans are looking for, and he delivers exactly what we expected to find (with certain refreshing plot twists) He also, knows Star Wars is a larger than life institution, and every new character comes to life in perfect synchronicity with what was established in the previous episodes.

Meet Ace pilot Poe Dameron.

Kylo Ren is really a bad bad Sith.

Does Episode VII have big revelations and/or plot twists? Yes, yes it does! But, do you really wanna know them beforehand? isn't the force an energy you have to discover yourself? Although the film features plenty of tributes to the original trilogy (prequels? nope, not even a subtle hint) Episode VII features new evil and yet the good old battle between the Sith and the Jedi is still there, the story has somewhat evolved into a new story line and it's as open for the new characters as it is for the most iconic heroes. The film reunites the best elements from the original trilogy while offering brand new uncharted territories at the same time.

Of course, it wouldn't be a Star Wars film if it didn't feature a heartbreaking moment. Such moment will clearly be a turning point for the remaining episodes. As for the new characters, Daisy Ridley steals the show with her portrayal of Rey the Scavenger. And so does John Boyega whose Finn is the perfect mix of an escapee looking for a second chance to do what's right. As for Adam Driver and his evil role as Kylo Ren there's a lot of things you want to find out yourself, he's not just another Sith in the likes of Darth Maul or Darth Tyrannus. He goes beyond that, and in doing so, he makes you bite more than you can chew.

New creatures in new galaxies far, far away.

Captain Phasma.

Overall, on a scale of 10/10 I'd say The Force Awakens is a straight 10. Is it better than the prequel trilogy films? Yes, definitely, it even stands very close to Revenge of the Sith. Honestly, what the hell! this film is so good that I can easily state that is as good as any episode from the original trilogy. So ,waste no more time and "to the theater you will go". May the force be with you all my fellow connoisseurs.

Here's the first movie trailer:

   
Here's the second movie trailer:

And here a hilarious SNL toy ad parody you should be watching as of right now: