Le Notti del Terrore: Burial Ground, The Nights of Terror

Deadlier than death itself!

While we are currently watching the remaining filmography of the hottie Leonora Fani, we check in our archives and found there are a few reviews waiting to be brought online since God knows when. Such is the case of Le Notti del Terrore AKA Burial Ground: The Nights of Terror. A 1981 zombie slasher that for the uninitiated may look like as if it was directed by Lucio Fulci, but no sir, it was not. However, the similarities or inspiration if you will, it's clearly there and director Andrea Bianchi is not afraid of coming up with something entirely new out of pure homage.   

Reviewers out there, have criticized this film value, but as always, our job is,  quoting Lion-O's "Sword of Omens, give me sight beyond sight" legendary quot, to see underneath and beyond every single element that makes a film worth watching entertainment, and Le Notti del Terrore will neither disappoint today's standard movie goer, nor film connoisseurs.  

"Is there a Starbucks near here, I'm dying for a Latte"

Man made special effects!

This is the one. This is the one that puts them all to shame. Fulci, Romero, no one has ever made living-dead cinema seem so dark, gritty, and down right apocalyptic as Andrea Bianchi. Obviously less expensive than anything from those other guys, Burial Ground is certainly no more complicated than anything else from the genre, three horny as fuck couples and a weird man-child are invited  into professor's Ayres to witness his latest discovery regarding an ancient stone. Unfortunately, they arrive too late because their host is horribly killed by recently awoken Zombies that live under his mansion for unexplained reasons. Unaware of what's to come, every couple is assigned a room by the professor's servants (also, unaware of his death) and what do you do inside a luxurious bedroom? you fuck! you fuck until you cum air bubbles! So, while all these couples were invited for this awesome science find, they don't really seem to give a damn about as long as they can fuck indoors & outdoors as they please. One of the characters, Evelyn (Mariangela Giordano) has a son that looks as creepy as the zombies they're about to meet. Anyways, this weirdo is somehow suffering from the Oedipus Complex (Sigmund Freud's way of saying a child could have sexual desires for his parents, in this case mother) and that will add extra creepiness to the overall value of the film.

The first twenty minutes of this epic mostly involves the giddy couples spouting ridiculous dialogue, flirting with each other, and frolicking about with not a care in the world, until it happens, the dead are coming back to life, and unfortunately, for some reason, there are a dozen or so rotted corpses buried in the garden. As bad as the English voice-overs are, they do a great job at sounding terrified once the madness begins. Probably more powerful than it was meant to be, Burial Ground gives you the strong impression that these dozens of zombies, some of which resemble the Toxic Avenger, just might take over the world after they're done with these guys. Burial Ground is a prime example of grainy, bad film quality unintentionally enhancing the horror quality. Some scenes, you cant even make out what's going on. Although the sci-fi-ish sound effects are out of place (there are even some screaming sounds where the actresses are actually not doing that on scene), it adds an apocalyptic feel that makes things seem even more hopeless and dismal. Some how, the unintentional humor doesn't overshadow any of this. Calling Burial Ground creepy would be an insult, nightmarish would be a good start.

What the fuck is that!? I only came here to suck dick!!

Hungry? grab a snickers!

What makes this movie so interesting 35 years later, is the fact the Bianchi did a fantastic job worrying about the one thing that matters in a horror film: Scary scenes, disgusting monsters, graphic violence and helpless characters. Burial Ground is a pretty straight forward film and there are no wasted on screen minutes explaining the science behind these zombies, as well as no deep character development. Just the right amount of spice to make you like the characters and root for them when they're in danger.

The zombie genre is clearly meant to entertain those who know how to watch this kind of movies, you see, we could easily escape zombies that walk slowly and move clumsily. Also, everyone knows shooting them in the head or decapitating them, instantly solves the problem. Nevertheless, our characters always have little to rely on, spending most of the movie time being defenseless. Still, how come they never decide to get out of the house, or run somewhere else away from this deadly bunch of snails? See! a movie goes down to the bottom of shittiness if we start applying real life science facts.

Boner!

Why won't you blow me mum?

However, the zombies in Burial Ground are not your average zombie. They can use tools to attack you, or they can even notice when they're outgunned. They move slow like most Zombies do, but they are smarter than you think. As a matter of fact, they can even disguise to confuse their victims! Also, they seem to be some kind of long gone secret religious cult, but I'll leave that for you to find out once you watch it  yourselves. 

The special effects are all man made, no CGI shit of any kind. The zombies look so disgusting, they even feature living worms inhabiting their skulls, and they somehow resemble mummified corpses (yes, I've been to museums too, I'm no couch potato) So you may not want to dip Nachos while watching Burial Ground. The movie was made in only four weeks on location in a real Italian castle. The workshop scenes were filmed on the same location for Dario Argento's Inferno. Although this flick premiered in 1981 in Italy & Germany, it was actually filmed a year before. Burial Ground was released in different years on different countries: 1983 on Spain, and in 1985 on Mexico and the USA. An official Region 2 DVD premiered on 2011 on Finland. In addition, Burial Ground was starred by Gianluigi Chirizzi & Mariangela Giordano, some of the most prominent actors & actresses of the Italian exploitation genre

Can you undress a bit more? do it for art!

Yum! a couple of unaware horny teens.

The darkness of this masterpiece goes far beneath the dark, grainy quality of the film, even when they show a sunny day, all I see in this film is darkness, things just seemed doomed from the very beginning, and that, exploitation fans, is the makings for true horror. Burial Ground stands next to the best Italian gore films, and that is next to The Beyond and Beyond the Darkness, Burial Ground has no equal. The only thing I can recommend more than this, is this on VHS, the film quality is even worse, the sky looks almost pink. VHS really brings out "that look" that the DVD format has ruined. Now, I know asking for a VHS tape on this day an age maybe a bit too much, but I' m sure you know about VHS-Rips. 

Overall, Burial Ground, is a feast of Gore, nudity, incest creepiness and more importantly, a feast of real horror, featuring the most disgusting Zombies you can find. The Walking Dead? ha,ha,ha, gimme a break, will ya?!

Here's the movie trailer: