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| Thrillers have never looked better. |
Knowing that the Philippines was one of the favorite countries in which directors produced several hundreds of B movies during the heyday of exploitation, it is nothing to be surprised about, in fact there are even websites dedicated only to cover films made in the Philippines. However, here at SPAM-Alternative we try to bring you the best out of the worst or the worst out of the worst if that makes any sense at all. Today we're travelling to the small island of the Philippines to gather around 1975's Cover Girl Models, which is yet another clichéd exploitation film you should definitely watch.
The cult director Cirio H. Santiago once again finds himself teaming up with Pat Anderson who plays a model named Barbara. She, along with two model friends – Claire (Lindsay Bloome) and Mandy (Tara Strohmeier) – hop a flight to that Hong Kong, the most favored destination in any globetrotting seventies exploitation movie. Once they get there, for reasons never fully explained in any sort of logical narrative sense, the trio wind up getting involved in an international spy ring. See, a roll of microfilm somehow fell into one of the girls’ dresses and now the nefarious bad guys want to get it back no matter the cost. Also, the girls do lots of fashion shows and get naked a few times, all of which leads up to a remarkably awful shoot out where cult actor Vic Diaz mows some poor slob down with a grease gun.
So, the clichéd story has it that the three beautiful American models will deliver us with plenty of action.
Director Cirio H. Santiago, working from a blithely inane script by
Howard R. Cohen, relates the amiably silly story at a snappy pace,
maintains a breezy'n'easy good-natured tone throughout, delivers a
copious amount of tasty female nudity, and stages the occasional
martial arts fight with an endearing ineptitude that's good for a few
unintentional laughs. This movie is further energized by the spirited
acting by a neat cast of familiar 70's exploitation cinema regulars:
Bloom, Strohmeier, and Anderson are all comely, sexy, and charming as
the titular trio, John Kramer contributes a solid performance as
slick'n'smarmy photographer Mark, and the ubiquitous Vic Diaz excels in
one of his trademark oily villain roles as the nefarious Kulik, plus
there are amusing bits by Mary Woronov as uptight executive Diane and
Rhonda Leigh Hopkins as the snippy and stuck-up Pamela. Felipe
Sacdalan's sunny cinematography gives the picture an attractive bright
look. D'Amarillo's bouncy'n'groovy score hits the right-on happening
spot. Best of all, the tight 73 minute running time ensures that this
flick never gets dull or overstays its welcome. A really enjoyable
diversion for those that understand these kind of movies. I wouldn't be so sure if a regular movie fan would stand it though.
Definitely, Cover Girl Models doesn’t always make a lot of sense and it rarely puts the three leading ladies directly in the action (as opposed to Fly Me or the mighty T.N.T. Jackson which Santiago made the same year and with some of the same people) but it clocks in at under seventy-five minutes so you can’t really fault its pacing. It plays just as well as a collection of weird seventies travelogue footage than as anything else and the camera seems to spend as much time showing off the exotic locations than following the girls around as they try to figure out just why the bad guys are after them, but you take what you can out of movies like this one.
A little nudity, a few bloody shot outs with some nice squib effects, a
gratuitous Vic Diaz cameo, some travelogue bits, a little more nudity…
yeah you could do worse than this if you’re looking for some fun,
disposable entertainment. My only complaint is that they didn't film enough nude/sex scenes, you know, having actresses that were regulars in the exploitation scene, you're definitely expecting to see some skin, I mean the first reason why we stand the running time of a bad film it is precisely the amount of nudity & sex we're being offered by movie posters & trailers.
Here a little clip from the movie to get you tempted:
The cult director Cirio H. Santiago once again finds himself teaming up with Pat Anderson who plays a model named Barbara. She, along with two model friends – Claire (Lindsay Bloome) and Mandy (Tara Strohmeier) – hop a flight to that Hong Kong, the most favored destination in any globetrotting seventies exploitation movie. Once they get there, for reasons never fully explained in any sort of logical narrative sense, the trio wind up getting involved in an international spy ring. See, a roll of microfilm somehow fell into one of the girls’ dresses and now the nefarious bad guys want to get it back no matter the cost. Also, the girls do lots of fashion shows and get naked a few times, all of which leads up to a remarkably awful shoot out where cult actor Vic Diaz mows some poor slob down with a grease gun.
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| Nice wet seethrough shirt. |
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| Three girls, one cup. |
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| Nice vintage outfit. |
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| Maybe here I can find someone to fuck my ass. |
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| I've swallowed cum from five men at once, don't tell me what to do. |
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| I can't seem to find my dildo. |
Definitely, Cover Girl Models doesn’t always make a lot of sense and it rarely puts the three leading ladies directly in the action (as opposed to Fly Me or the mighty T.N.T. Jackson which Santiago made the same year and with some of the same people) but it clocks in at under seventy-five minutes so you can’t really fault its pacing. It plays just as well as a collection of weird seventies travelogue footage than as anything else and the camera seems to spend as much time showing off the exotic locations than following the girls around as they try to figure out just why the bad guys are after them, but you take what you can out of movies like this one.
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| fuck my pussy, fuck it now! |
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| I want your cum all over my face. |
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| Hi, wanna fuck? |
Here a little clip from the movie to get you tempted:
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