Malibu Express

Spanish VHS poster.

Although "Malibu Express" is officially the first film in the Andy Sidaris "Bullets, Bombs and Babes" series, it's clear that he still hadn't perfected the formula that would dominate his later work. The film has a male lead, and most of the women are portrayed as nymphos / sex objects. Of course, I know that in an Andy Sidaris film the women have a tendency to remove their clothes at the drop of a hat, but they also have a tendency to shoot people, blow things up, etc. Apart from one scene, of a crackshot policewoman embarrassing the hero who is a lousy shot, there is none of that in Malibu Express in other words, there is no empowerment to balance the exploitation. The film is a low-rent cross between James Bond, "Smokey and the Bandit" (country music, hicks and car races) and Agatha Christie (there is a murder in a household and everybody is a suspect). 

The goons.

You lucky bastard.

Sleazy buttler's corpse.

Our hero's ride.

No, I'm not a Magnum knock off.

The Buffington's.

A good cop is a good catch.

So, Andy Sidaris first bullets, bombs and babes film tells the story of Cody Abilene (Darby Hinton), a private investigator whose cases involve espionage and a rich & dysfunctional family who all want to keep an eye on each other. What really sets the whole thing in motion is when ultra sleazy butler Shane (Brett Baxter Clark) is stabbed and murdered. With an irresistible country flavored music score in the background, Malibu Express delivers a respectable amount of wacky & kinky episodes. In fact, the film does become fairly episodic, and does go on a little long, but it's still fun enough. What really helps is the way Sidaris maintains a healthy sense of humor about the whole thing. Granted, some jokes are overplayed: the Buffington family wear out their welcome after their first scene. Of course, with so many extremely luscious babes on full display, how many viewers are going to care about anything else in the film?

Literally Tits knockers.

80's fashion.

Let's watch some TV first.

Nice shower.

Nicer double shower.

Tits you moron!

Shower time honey!

If one is watching this, and trying to keep the plot straight, they're really missing the point. Playmates Kimberly McArthur and Barbara Edwards as Faye and May are delicious the way that they constantly throw themselves at the affable Cody, who proves to be one hell of a lucky man. All of us guys should have problems like his! Particularly watchable are Lori Sutton as Cody's detective friend Beverly, Niki Dantine as Lady Lillian Chamberlain, adorable Playmate Lynda Wiesmeier as sexy race car driver June Khnockers, and the unbeatable B movie goddess Sybil Danning as Contessa Luciana. The violent climax is good energetic fun as Cody and June race to avoid being taken out by a trio of relentless assassins. Overall, this has got enough good stuff to keep trash fans happy and if you don't believe check this playboy photos that inspired Sidaris to hire such talented actresses:

Sign here please.

Swell!

Definitely, you're in lady.

Sybil Danning.

Hey kids! this isn't a porn blog, nor an erotic site it's a movies blog and if you can't tell the difference I'm sorry but I'm not going to be posting nude pics randomly, every pic here has its and/or direct relation with the film depicted.

To finish today's review as usual the movie trailer, and stay tuned cause I will review the 12 films Sidaris made under the idea of guns and babes.

Now, if my words are too boring or extensive for your TV set mind, there was this guy who made this video which basically summarizes the film in a minute and a half.

Thank you and good night.